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It as true that normal people couldn't hear Gaspode speak, because dogs don't speak. It's a well know fact. ... Besides, almost all dogs don't talk. Ones that do are merely a statistical error, and can therefore be ignored.

Terry Pratchett

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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Fact
Dog
Speak
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People
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More quotes by Terry Pratchett

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Cats don't hunt seals. They would if they knew what they were and where to find them. But they don't, so that's all right.
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Putting up a statue to someone who tried to stop a war is not very, um, statuesque. Of course, if you had butchered five hundred of your own men out of arrogant carelessness, we'd be melting the bronze already.
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The Monks of Cool, whose tiny and exclusive monastery is hidden in a really cool and laid-back valley in the lower Ramtops, have a passing-out test for a novice. He is taken into a room full of all types of clothing and asked: Yo, my son, which of these is the most stylish thing to wear? And the correct answer is: Hey, whatever I select.
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Yes, but people have got to believe that, or what's the point MY POINT EXACTLY.
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It was raining in the small, mountainous country of Llamedos. It was always raining in Llamedos. Rain was the country's main export. It had rain mines.
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Needless to say, they refused to submit to the Empire, conducting such a persistent guerrilla war that the Romans gave up hope of conquering Scotland, and the Wee Free Men remained both wee and free.
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See a pin and pick it up, and, all day long, you'll have a pin.
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There are some things that are more appropriate to a children's than an adult book but there's a huge overlapping area and most kids read an age group up anyway.
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Aziraphale. The Enemy, of course. But an enemy for six thousand years now, which made him a sort of friend.
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She'd stopped reading the kind of women's magazine that talked about romance and knitting and started reading the kind of women's magazine that talked about orgasms, but apart from making a mental note to have one if ever the occasion presented itsel
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I should have learned this, she thought. I wanted to learn fire, and pain, but I should have learned people.
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The enemy isn’t men, or women, it’s bloody stupid people and no-one has the right to be stupid.
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Science fiction is fantasy with bolts painted on outside.
Terry Pratchett
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It's very rare that I ever go and research a particular subject. Mostly I do serendipitous research, I read stuff, things spinning out of the page.
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Personally, I think the best motto for an educational establishment is: 'Or Would You Rather Be a Mule?'
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Adventure! People talked about the idea as if it were something worthwhile, rather than a mess of bad food, no sleep and strange people inexplicably trying to stick pointed objects in bits of you.
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But here's some advice, boy. Don't put your trust in revolutions. They always come around again. That's why they're called revolutions.
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Raise the stakes! Always push your luck because no one else would push it for you.
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You can't build a plot out of jokes. You need tragic relief. And you need to let people know that when a lot of frightened people are running around with edged weaponry, there are deaths. Stupid deaths, usually. I'm not writing 'The A-Team' - if there's a fight going on, people will get hurt. Not letting this happen would be a betrayal.
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All I am really promoting in the books is the Golden Rule, which I hope everybody knows to be do as you would be done by. It has one or 2 flaws, but it is a good soundbite. Evil starts when you treat other people as things. There are perhaps worse crimes, but they begin when you treat other people as things.
Terry Pratchett