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Monsters are getting more uppity, too (...) I heard where this guy, he killed this monster in this lake, no problem, stuck its arm up over the door (...) and you know what? Its mum come and complained. Its actual mum come right down to the hall next day and complained. Actually complained. That's the respect you get.

Terry Pratchett

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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Guy
Actual
Complained
Getting
Killed
Lake
Actually
Stuck
Mum
Next
Door
Hall
Problem
Doors
Monster
Come
Arms
Halls
Right
Respect
Lakes
Heard
Monsters
Uppity

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And when the Patrician was unhappy, he became very democratic. He found intricate and painful ways of spreading that unhappiness as far as possible.
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Be one of the crowd? It went against everything a wizard stood for, and a wizard would not stand for anything if he could sit down for it, but even sitting down, you had to stand out.
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The universe clearly operates for the benefit of humanity. This can be readily seen from the convenient way the sun comes up in the morning, when people are ready to start the day.
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The three rules of the Librarians of Time and Space are: 1) Silence 2) Books must be returned by no later than the date shown and 3) Do not interfere with the nature of causality.
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And what would humans be without love? Rare, said Death.
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It's a sword. said the Hogfather. They're not meant to be safe.
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Most species do their own evolving, making it up as they go along, which is the way Nature intended.
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...'I thought the rule was that all monks were shaved.' 'Oh, Soto says he is bald under the hair,'said Lu Tze. 'He says the hair is a separate creature that just happens to live on him.
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She was already learning that if you ignore the rules people will, half the time, quietly rewrite them so that they don't apply to you.
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Sometimes I feel that the world is made up of sensible people who know the plot and bloody idiots who don't.
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I found while driving in Wyoming that wearing a stetson and driving a beat-up pickup meant you could go as fast as you like, while the police picked up Californian winnebagos that went one mph over 55. After all, they wanted to bring money into the state, not merely circulate it.
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You can't die with an unfinished book.
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You had to hand it to the Patrician, he admitted grudgingly. If you didn't, he sent men to come and take it away.
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I would like you to teach [the orcs] civilised behaviour, said Ladyship coldly. He appeared to consider this. Yes of course, I think that would be quite possible, he said. And who would you send to teach the humans?
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It's actually true that I keep myself going by constantly promising myself that in response for the hard work I will be allowed to do some more hard work later on.
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Nanny Ogg knew how to start spelling 'banana', but didn't know how you stopped.
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A European says: I can't understand this, what's wrong with me? An American says: I can't understand this, what's wrong with him? I make no suggestion that one side or other is right, but observation over many years leads me to believe it is true.
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They obeyed, as wise men do when a woman puts her foot down . . .
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As a species, we are forever sticking our finger into the electric socket of the universe to see what will happen next.
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