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You know, you're rather amusingly wrong.

Terry Pratchett

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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Witty
Wrong
Rather

More quotes by Terry Pratchett

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Most species do their own evolving, making it up as they go along, which is the way Nature intended. And this is all very natural and organic and in tune with mysterious cycles of the cosmos, which believes that there's nothing like millions of years of really frustrating trial and error to give a species moral fiber and, in some cases, backbone.
Terry Pratchett
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They were small, brightly coloured, happy little creatures who secreted some of the nastiest toxins in the world, which is why the job of looking after the large vivarium where they happily passed their days was given to first-year students, on the basis that if they got things wrong there wouldn't be too much education wasted.
Terry Pratchett
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In order to have a change of fortune at the last minute, you have to take your fortune to the last minute.
Terry Pratchett
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WHERE'S MY COW? ARE YOU MY COW?
Terry Pratchett
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Anyway, why would you trust anything written down? She certainly didn't trust Mothers of Borogravia! and that was from the government. And if you couldn't trust the government, who could you trust? Very nearly everyone, come to think of it.
Terry Pratchett
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Just because you've got a mind like a hammer doesn't mean you have to treat everyone else like a nail
Terry Pratchett
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The entire universe has been neatly divided into things to (a) mate with, (b) eat, (c) run away from, and (d) rocks.
Terry Pratchett
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The three rules of the Librarians of Time and Space are: 1) Silence 2) Books must be returned by no later than the date shown and 3) Do not interfere with the nature of causality.
Terry Pratchett
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Things have no power that humans don't put there.
Terry Pratchett
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This is space. It's sometimes called the final frontier. (Except that of course you can't have a final frontier, because there'd be nothing for it to be a frontier to, but as frontiers go, it's pretty penultimate . . .)
Terry Pratchett
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In ancient times cats were worshiped as gods they have not forgotten this.
Terry Pratchett
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An Assassin, a real Assassin had to look like one-black clothes, hood, boots, and all. If they could wear any clothes, any disguise, then what could anyone do but spend all day in a small room with a loaded crossbow pointed at the door?
Terry Pratchett
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Corporal Nobbs had been disqualified from the human race for shoving
Terry Pratchett
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If you don't know when to be a human being, you don't know when to be a witch.
Terry Pratchett
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Peace?' said Vetinari. 'Ah, yes, defined as period of time to allow for preparation for the next war.
Terry Pratchett
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The shortest unit of time in the multiverse is the New York Second, defined as the period of time between the traffic lights turning green and the cab behind you honking.
Terry Pratchett
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Magic is just a way of saying 'I don't know.'
Terry Pratchett
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If you have let pride get the better of you, then you have already lost, but if you grab pride by the scruff of the neck and ride it like a stallion, then you may have already won.
Terry Pratchett
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I don't want unnecessary violence, sergeant, said Blouse. Right you are, sir! said the sergeant. Carborundum! First man comes through that door runnin', I want him nailed to the wall! He caught the lieutenant's eye, and added: But not too hard!
Terry Pratchett
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Oh, there's plenty of reasons. I just don't know which one.
Terry Pratchett