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This looks like a job for inadvisably applied magic if ever I saw one.

Terry Pratchett

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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Saws
Magic
Jobs
Ever
Looks
Like
Applied

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It’s quite easy to accidentally overhear people talking downstairs if you hold an upturned glass to the floorboards and accidentally put your ear to it.
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Young man, the games we play are lessons we learn. The assumptions we make, things we ignore, and things we change make us what we become.
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Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying 'End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH,' the paint wouldn't even have time to dry.
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Welcome to fear, said Moist to himself. It's hope, turned inside out. You know it can't go wrong, you're sure it can't go wrong... But it might.
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Witches were a bit like cats. They didn’t much like one another’s company, but they did like to know where all the other witches were, just in case they needed them.
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Lots of people would be as cowardly as me if they were brave enough.
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Generally I start writing when I have even the smallest idea of how a book is going to go, because the physical process of writing itself keeps the mind active and focused on the job at hand. Usually I write in about 5 drafts, but that simply means there are 5 definite times when I go in a linear fashion from the beginning to the end of the book.
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I do not in fact use many puns. Certainly there are far fewer than people believe. But I suspect the ones I do occasionally use tend to hang around in people's memories for a while.
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It's tough at the top. It's tough at the bottom. But in between you could use them for horse-shoes.
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Many an ancient lord's last words have been, 'You can't kill me because I've got magic aaargh.'
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ASTONISHING, said Death. REALLY ASTONISHING. LET ME PUT FORWARD ANOTHER SUGGESTION: THAT YOU ARE NOTHING MORE THAN A LUCKY SPECIES OF APE THAT IS TRYING TO UNDERSTAND THE COMPLEXITIES OF CREATION VIA A LANGUAGE THAT EVOLVED IN ORDER TO TELL ONE ANOTHER WHERE THE RIPE FRUIT WAS.
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But is all this true? said Brutha. Didactylos shrugged. Could be. Could be. We are here and it is now. The way I see it is, after that, everything tends towards guesswork. You mean you don't KNOW it's true? said Brutha. I THINK it might be, said Didactylos. I could be wrong. Not being certain is what being a philosopher is all abou
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Go on, prove me wrong. Destroy the fabric of the universe. See if I care.
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Just because something is a metaphor doesn't mean it can't be real.
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Death was standing behind a lectern, poring over a map. He looked at Mort as if he wasn’t entirely there. You haven't heard of the bayof mante, have you? He said. “No, sir,” said Mort. Famous shipwreck there. “Was there?” there will be, said Death, if I can find the damn place.
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People don't like to say Horror so they say Dark Fantasy because that's Horror wearing a collar and tie.
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There are some things that are more appropriate to a children's than an adult book but there's a huge overlapping area and most kids read an age group up anyway.
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The intelligence of the creature known as a crowd, is the square root of the number of people in it.
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Remember - that which does not kill us can only make us stronger. And that which does kill us leaves us dead!
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You haven't really been anywhere until you've got back home.
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