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It wasn't that Nanny Ogg sang badly. It was just that she could hit notes which, when amplified by a tin bath half full of water, ceased to be sound and became some sort of invasive presence.
Terry Pratchett
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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Became
Tin
Wasn
Bath
Full
Ceased
Sort
Baths
Invasive
Half
Sang
Sound
Badly
Amplified
Water
Presence
Nanny
Notes
Nannies
More quotes by Terry Pratchett
Time was something that largely happened to other people he viewed it in the same way that people on the shore viewed the sea. It was big and it was out there, and sometimes it was an invigorating thing to dip a toe into, but you couldn't live in it all the time. Besides, it always made his skin wrinkle.
Terry Pratchett
I'd like to stand up for the rights of people who put everything on their burger - chutney, mustard, pickle, mustard pickle, tomato sauce... It is common knowledge in my family that I can't tell the difference between a veggie burger and a meat one, because the ratio of burger to pickles is so high.
Terry Pratchett
Real children do not go hoppity skip unless they are on drugs.
Terry Pratchett
There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.
Terry Pratchett
Nac Mac Feegle! The Wee Free Men! Nae king! Nae quin! Nae laird! Nae master! We willna' be fooled again!
Terry Pratchett
Colon thought Carrot was simple. Carrot often struck people as simple. And he was. Where people went wrong was thinking that simple meant the same thing as stupid.
Terry Pratchett
Stand before your god, bow before your king, kneel before your man.
Terry Pratchett
No clowns were funny. That was the whole purpose of a clown. People laughed at clowns, but only out of nervousness. The point of clowns was that, after watching them, anything else that happened seemed enjoyable
Terry Pratchett
Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying 'End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH,' the paint wouldn't even have time to dry.
Terry Pratchett
Cake is not the issue here.
Terry Pratchett
Only Ron's dog was watching William. He considered that it had, for a dog, a very offensive and knowing look. A couple of months ago someaone had tried to hand William the old story about there being a dog in the city that could talk. (...) The dog in front of William didn't look as if it could talk, but it DID look as if it would swear.
Terry Pratchett
WHERE'S MY COW? ARE YOU MY COW?
Terry Pratchett
The man gave a shrug which indicated that, although the world did indeed have many problems, this was one of them that was not his.
Terry Pratchett
There’s no point in believing in things that exist.
Terry Pratchett
Actors, said Granny, witheringly. As if the world weren't full of enough history without inventing more.
Terry Pratchett
Neither of my parents went to church, but they did everything that you needed to do to be Christian. That's something a Quaker would call an intimation of the divine.
Terry Pratchett
I know loads of coppers and dealt with them a lot when I was a journalist - coppers are easy to write for they tend to run on rails.
Terry Pratchett
No one thinks that young adults read hooks for YOUNG ADULTS, books for young adults are read by kids.
Terry Pratchett
One of the hardest lessons in young Sam's life had been finding out that the people in charge weren't in charge. It had been finding out that governments were not, on the whole, staffed by people who had a grip, and that plans were what people made instead of thinking.
Terry Pratchett
Death was standing behind a lectern, poring over a map. He looked at Mort as if he wasn’t entirely there. You haven't heard of the bayof mante, have you? He said. “No, sir,” said Mort. Famous shipwreck there. “Was there?” there will be, said Death, if I can find the damn place.
Terry Pratchett