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If you try to to take my bananas from me, I will reclaim them from your cold dead hands.

Terry Pratchett

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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Reclaim
Bananas
Cold
Dead
Hands
Take
Trying

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I used to think that I was stupid, and then I met philosophers.
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Privilege (to the privileged) means having private laws.
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My advice is this. For Christ's sake, don't write a book that is suitable for a kid of 12 years old, because the kids who read who are 12 years old are reading books for adults. I read all of the James Bond books when I was about 11, which was approximately the right time to read James Bond books.
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I know it's a very human thing to say 'Is there anything I can do', but in this case I would only entertain offers from very high-end experts in brain chemistry.
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I can't be talking to a tree. If I was talking to a tree I'd be mad, and I'm not mad, so trees can't talk.
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Bill Door was impressed. Miss Flitworth could actually give the word revenue, which had two vowels and one diphthong, all the peremptoriness of the word scum.
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It was one of those problematic occasions with long silences, sporadic coughs, and people saying isolated things like, Well, isn't this nice.
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What's a philosopher?' said Brutha. Someone who's bright enough to find a job with no heavy lifting,' said a voice in his head.
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In ancient times cats were worshiped as gods they have not forgotten this.
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In the words of the philosopher Sceptum, the founder of my profession: am I going to get paid for this?
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Rings try to find their way back to their owner. Someone ought to write a book about it.
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All I am really promoting in the books is the Golden Rule, which I hope everybody knows to be do as you would be done by. It has one or 2 flaws, but it is a good soundbite. Evil starts when you treat other people as things. There are perhaps worse crimes, but they begin when you treat other people as things.
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And he dreamed the dream of all those who publish books, which was to have so much gold in your pockets that you would have to employ two people just to hold your trousers up.
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In the end the problem isn't that you have the wrong sort of government for the People, but that you have the wrong sort of People.
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Things like crowns had a troublesome effect on clever folk it was best to leave all the reigning to the kind of people whose eyebrows met in the middle when they tried to think. In a funny sort of way, they were much better at it.
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What's money interested in? More money.
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Everyone should occasionally break the law in some small and delightful way. It's good for the hygiene of the brain.
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The duke had a mind that ticked like a clock and, like a clock, it regularly went cuckoo.
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I particularly admire are Mark Twain and Jerome K. Jerome who wrote in a certain tone of voice which was humane and understanding of humanity, but always ready to annotate its little foibles. I think I'd lay my cards down on that, and say that it's that that I'm trying to do.
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A police procedural novel can be even funnier if the police include Trolls and Dwarves and things like that. You start looking at the whole basis of the cop novel. You get the cop moving in a different way when you've actually set it in a fantasy city.
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