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It's a sword. said the Hogfather. They're not meant to be safe.

Terry Pratchett

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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Sword
Meant
Safe

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Humans need fantasy in order to be human.
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Bringing about Armageddon can be dangerous. Do not attempt it in your own home.
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Creatures which, lacking mankind's superior brain power, did not concern themselves with finding someone to blame, and instead tried to find someone to eat.
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I've got wide tastes, but I don't like jazz.
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Aziraphale. The Enemy, of course. But an enemy for six thousand years now, which made him a sort of friend.
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Last night there seemed to be a chance. Anything was possible last night. That was the trouble with last nights. They were always followed by this mornings.
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Where's the pleasure in bein' the winner if the loser ain't alive to know they've lost?
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Sergeant Colon of the Ankh-Morpork City Guard was on duty. He was guarding the Brass Bridge, the main link between Ankh and Morpork. From theft. When it came to crime prevention, Sergeant Colon found it safest to think big.
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It was sad music. But it waved its sadness like a battle flag. It said the universe had done all it could, but you were still alive.
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The ideal death, I think, is what was the ideal Victorian death, you know, with your grandchildren around you, a bit of sobbing. And you say goodbye to your loved ones, making certain that one of them has been left behind to look after the shop.
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My character - and for that matter my worst habits - could only be described by someone else. You can't open a box with the crowbar inside it.
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Death was standing behind a lectern, poring over a map. He looked at Mort as if he wasn’t entirely there. You haven't heard of the bayof mante, have you? He said. “No, sir,” said Mort. Famous shipwreck there. “Was there?” there will be, said Death, if I can find the damn place.
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The point is that descriptive writing is very rarely entirely accurate and during the reign of Olaf Quimby II as Patrician of Ankh-Morpork some legislation was passed in a determined attempt to ?put a stop to this sort of thing and introduce some honest.
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It's not Brits who think American readers are a bunch of whinging morons with the geo-social understanding of a wire coathanger, it's American editors.
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Cats will amusingly tolerate humans only until someone comes up with a tin opener that can be operated with a paw.
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Experience has taught me that you feel better on a flight if you avoid chicken fat in plastic sauce.
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The thing about stories is you have to pick the ones that last.
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Too much magic could wrap time and space around itself, and that wasn't good news for the kind of person who had grown used to things like effects following things like causes.
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The three rules of the Librarians of Time and Space are: 1) Silence 2) Books must be returned by no later than the date shown and 3) Do not interfere with the nature of causality.
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But that was just it - hate was exactly the right word. Hate is a force of attraction. Hate is just love with its back turned.
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