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I would like you to teach [the orcs] civilised behaviour, said Ladyship coldly. He appeared to consider this. Yes of course, I think that would be quite possible, he said. And who would you send to teach the humans?
Terry Pratchett
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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Humans
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More quotes by Terry Pratchett
This looks like a job for inadvisably applied magic if ever I saw one.
Terry Pratchett
I can no longer type, so I use TalkingPoint and Dragon Dictate. It's a speech-to-text program, and there's an add-on for talking which some guys came up with.
Terry Pratchett
Bill Door was impressed. Miss Flitworth could actually give the word revenue, which had two vowels and one diphthong, all the peremptoriness of the word scum.
Terry Pratchett
DO I DETECT A NOTE OF UNSEASONAL GRUMPINESS? said Death. NO SUGAR PIGGYWIGGY FOR YOU, ALBERT.
Terry Pratchett
Some pirates achieved immortality by great deeds of cruelty or derring-do. Some achieved immortality by amassing great wealth. But the captain had long ago decided that he would, on the whole, prefer to achieve immortality by not dying.
Terry Pratchett
A bad hunter chases. A good hunter waits.
Terry Pratchett
In ancient times cats were worshiped as gods they have not forgotten this.
Terry Pratchett
Belief was never mentioned at home, but right actions were taught by daily example.
Terry Pratchett
Money is an unavoidable consequence, but it isn't the reason I write if it was, I wouldn't have written any of the YA books, because advances in that field are small compared to what I'd got now for an 'adult' DW.
Terry Pratchett
Last night there seemed to be a chance. Anything was possible last night. That was the trouble with last nights. They were always followed by this mornings.
Terry Pratchett
Never trust any complicated cocktail that remains perfectly clear until the last ingredient goes in, and then immediately clouds.
Terry Pratchett
They may have been ugly. They may have been evil. But when it came to poetry in motion, the Things had all the grace and coordination of a deck-chair.
Terry Pratchett
Joy is to fun what the deep sea is to a puddle. It’s a feeling inside that can hardly be contained.
Terry Pratchett
Experience has taught me that you feel better on a flight if you avoid chicken fat in plastic sauce.
Terry Pratchett
The sun is simple. A sword is simple. A storm is simple. Behind everything simple is a huge tail of complicated.
Terry Pratchett
I'm not really good at fun-to-know, human interest stuff. We're not 'celebrities', whose life itself is a performance. Good or bad or ugly, we are our words. They're what people meet.
Terry Pratchett
I'm trying to remember how you tell the time by looking at the sun. -I should leave it for a while, it's too bright to see the numbers at the moment.
Terry Pratchett
So much paperwork to read! So much paperwork to push away! So much paperwork to pretend he hadn't received and that might have been eaten by gargoyles.
Terry Pratchett
You can't build a plot out of jokes. You need tragic relief. And you need to let people know that when a lot of frightened people are running around with edged weaponry, there are deaths. Stupid deaths, usually. I'm not writing 'The A-Team' - if there's a fight going on, people will get hurt. Not letting this happen would be a betrayal.
Terry Pratchett
A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores.
Terry Pratchett