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You just put that sword away, sir, please, said the voice of Lance-Constable Vimes. You will not shoot me, you young idiot. That would be murder, said the captain calmly. Not where I'm aiming, sir.

Terry Pratchett

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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Away
Sword
Young
Captain
Would
Captains
Shoot
Idiot
Constable
Murder
Lance
Please
Calmly
Voice
Aiming

More quotes by Terry Pratchett

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I'm up to my neck in the real world, every day. Just you try doing your VAT return with a head full of goblins.
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They may have been ugly. They may have been evil. But when it came to poetry in motion, the Things had all the grace and coordination of a deck-chair.
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Privilege (to the privileged) means having private laws.
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Perhaps the magic would last, perhaps it wouldn't. But then again, what does?
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You can think and you can fight, but the world's always movin', and if you wanna stay ahead you gotta dance.
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Bill Door was impressed. Miss Flitworth could actually give the word revenue, which had two vowels and one diphthong, all the peremptoriness of the word scum.
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Everyone knew there were wolves in the mountains, but they seldom came near the village-the modern wolves were the offspring of ancestors that had survived because they had learned that human meat had sharp edges.
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They were small, brightly coloured, happy little creatures who secreted some of the nastiest toxins in the world, which is why the job of looking after the large vivarium where they happily passed their days was given to first-year students, on the basis that if they got things wrong there wouldn't be too much education wasted.
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I’m a witch. It’s what we do. When it’s nobody else’s business, it’s my business.
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Botswana is also the only country in the world with a colour in its flag meant to represent rain (a sort of blue-grey). Not many people know this.
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I don't really plan. I'm almost intuitive about things.
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He's probably their battle poet, too. You mean he makes up heroic songs about famous battles? No, no. He recites poems that frighten the enemy....When a well-trained gonnagle starts to recite, the enemy's ears explode.
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Pets are always a great help in times of stress. And in times of starvation too, o'course.
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I used to think that I was stupid, and then I met philosophers.
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The sun rose slowly, as if it wasn't sure it was worth all the effort.
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And he dreamed the dream of all those who publish books, which was to have so much gold in your pockets that you would have to employ two people just to hold your trousers up.
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Granny sighed. You have learned something, she said, and thought it safe to insert a touch of sternness into her voice. They say a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but it is not one half so bad as a lot of ignorance.
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Probably the last sound heard before the Universe folded up like a paper hat would be someone saying, What happens if I do this?
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After a while, another voice said: One, two, three, four- And the universe came into being. It was wrong to call it a big bang. That would just be noise, and all that noise could create is more noise and a cosmos full of random particles. Matter exploded into being, apparently as chaos, but in fact as a chord. The ultimate power chord.
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What is normal? Normal was yesterday. If you lose a leg, one day you're hopping around on one leg, so you know the difference.
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