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Ridcully was to management what King Herod was to the Bethlehem Playgroup Association.

Terry Pratchett

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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Association
Management
King
Kings
Herod
Bethlehem

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Gods prefer simple, vicious games, where you Do Not Achieve Transcendence but Go Straight To Oblivion a key to the understanding of all religion is that a god's idea of amusement is Snakes and Ladders with greased rungs.
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No, I happen to be one of those people whose memory shuts down under pressure. The answers would come to me in the middle of the night in my sleep! Besides, I am a millionaire.
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A police procedural novel can be even funnier if the police include Trolls and Dwarves and things like that. You start looking at the whole basis of the cop novel. You get the cop moving in a different way when you've actually set it in a fantasy city.
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If anyone wants one my advise is to go where the orthodox Jews shop, because when it comes to a big black fedora, the guys with ringlets and long black coats definitely know a stylish hat when they see one. You want to get it home and use a hot steaming kettle, and bob's your uncle - you have a hat with all the right curves!
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It's tough at the top. It's tough at the bottom. But in between you could use them for horse-shoes.
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You just put that sword away, sir, please, said the voice of Lance-Constable Vimes. You will not shoot me, you young idiot. That would be murder, said the captain calmly. Not where I'm aiming, sir.
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- I notice you didn't laugh, Mr. Black! - No, Your Majesty. We are forbidden to laugh at the things kings say, sire, because otherwise we would be at it all day.
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After you've been working fairly intensively on a novel for six months you never want to see the damn thing again.
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There's a door, he whispered. Where does it go? It stays where it is, I think, said Rincewind.
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Maybe the only significant difference between a really smart simulation and a human being was the noise they made when you punched them.
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When people say things are a lot more complicated than that, they means they're getting worried that they won't like the truth.
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I never said nothing... I know you never! I could hear you not saying anything! You've got the loudest silences I ever did hear from anyone who wasn't dead!
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You can think and you can fight, but the world's always movin', and if you wanna stay ahead you gotta dance.
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So, mistletoe, in fact, symbolizes mistletoe.
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Vampires have risen from the dead, the grave, and the crypt, but have never managed it from the cat.
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Inside every sane person there’s a madman struggling to get out.
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Five exclamation marks: the sure sign of an insane mind.
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One of the hardest lessons in young Sam's life had been finding out that the people in charge weren't in charge. It had been finding out that governments were not, on the whole, staffed by people who had a grip, and that plans were what people made instead of thinking.
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Hello, inner child, I'm the inner babysitter!
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I'll be more enthusiastic about encouraging thinking outside the box when there's evidence of any thinking going on inside it.
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