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A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores.
Terry Pratchett
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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Marriage
Two
Made
Always
People
Snores
Snoring
Swear
Prepared
More quotes by Terry Pratchett
No, I happen to be one of those people whose memory shuts down under pressure. The answers would come to me in the middle of the night in my sleep! Besides, I am a millionaire.
Terry Pratchett
There was no safety. There was no pride. All there was, was money. Everything became money, and money became everything. Money treated us as if we were things, and we died.
Terry Pratchett
This was not a fairy-tale castle and there was no such thing as a fairy-tale ending, but sometimes you could threaten to kick the handsome prince in the ham-and-eggs.
Terry Pratchett
Taxation is just a sophisticated way of demanding money with menaces.
Terry Pratchett
Pride is all very well, but a sausage is a sausage.
Terry Pratchett
He's probably their battle poet, too. You mean he makes up heroic songs about famous battles? No, no. He recites poems that frighten the enemy....When a well-trained gonnagle starts to recite, the enemy's ears explode.
Terry Pratchett
It seems that when you have cancer you are a brave battler against the disease, but when you have Alzheimer's you are an old fart. That's how people see you. It makes you feel quite alone.
Terry Pratchett
The words are easy - most of them have already been invented.
Terry Pratchett
You just put that sword away, sir, please, said the voice of Lance-Constable Vimes. You will not shoot me, you young idiot. That would be murder, said the captain calmly. Not where I'm aiming, sir.
Terry Pratchett
He moved in a way that suggested he was attempting the world speed record for the nonchalant walk.
Terry Pratchett
Right! Right! You can get there! I can get there! You're a natural at counting to two! I'm a nat'ral at counting to two! If you can count to two, you can count to anything! If I can count to two, I can count to anything! And then the world is your mollusc! My mollusc! What's a mollusc?
Terry Pratchett
The sun is simple. A sword is simple. A storm is simple. Behind everything simple is a huge tail of complicated.
Terry Pratchett
The fastest way to travel is to be there already.
Terry Pratchett
The Auditors fluttered anxiously. And, as always happens in their species when something goes radically wrong and needs fixing instantly, they settled down to try to work how who was to blame.
Terry Pratchett
When you stand between two mirrors you're spread out among the images, your whole soul is pulled out thin, and somewhere in the distant images a dark part of you might get out and come looking for you, if you aren't careful.
Terry Pratchett
You've got a lot of time for abstract thought when you've got your hand stuck up a dead badger.
Terry Pratchett
Humans can think inhuman thoughts.
Terry Pratchett
Look out! He's got a daisy!
Terry Pratchett
Young adults that actually read are reading bodice rippers and best-sellers and me. And Horror.
Terry Pratchett
After a while, another voice said: One, two, three, four- And the universe came into being. It was wrong to call it a big bang. That would just be noise, and all that noise could create is more noise and a cosmos full of random particles. Matter exploded into being, apparently as chaos, but in fact as a chord. The ultimate power chord.
Terry Pratchett
