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Sergeant Colon of the Ankh-Morpork City Guard was on duty. He was guarding the Brass Bridge, the main link between Ankh and Morpork. From theft. When it came to crime prevention, Sergeant Colon found it safest to think big.

Terry Pratchett

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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Bridge
Sergeant
Cities
Guard
Sergeants
Came
Links
Safest
Bigs
Bridges
Guarding
Found
Main
Brass
Think
City
Prevention
Thinking
Theft
Ankh
Crime
Link
Colon
Duty

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And Sam Vimes thought: Why is Young Sam's nursery full of farmyard animals anyway? Why are his books full of moo-cows and baa-lambs? He is growing up in the city. He will only see them on a plate! They go sizzle!
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I think that sick people in Ankh-Morpork generally go to a vet. It's generally a better bet. There's more pressure on a vet to get it right. People say it was god's will when granny dies, but they get angry when they lose a cow.
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...'I thought the rule was that all monks were shaved.' 'Oh, Soto says he is bald under the hair,'said Lu Tze. 'He says the hair is a separate creature that just happens to live on him.
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The thing about stories is you have to pick the ones that last.
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Death was standing behind a lectern, poring over a map. He looked at Mort as if he wasn’t entirely there. You haven't heard of the bayof mante, have you? He said. “No, sir,” said Mort. Famous shipwreck there. “Was there?” there will be, said Death, if I can find the damn place.
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The thing about football - the important thing about football - is that it is not just about football.
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Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages.
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Apes had it worked out. No ape would philosophize, The mountain is, and is not. They would think, The banana is. I will eat the banana. There is no banana. I want another banana.
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I'm interested in mythology generally, but India has no special place in my heart - although Hindu gods seem a lot more fun.
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I would advise budding writers some other kind of job, unless they think they're very, very lucky.
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There was this about vampires : they could never look scruffy. Instead, they were... what was the word... deshabille. It meant untidy, but with bags and bags of style.
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People flock in, nevertheless, in search of answers to those questions only librarians are considered to be able to answer, such as Is this the laundry? How do you spell surreptitious? and, on a regular basis, Do you have a book I remember reading once? It had a red cover and it turned out they were twins.
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People aren't just people, they are people surrounded by circumstances.
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I do note with interest that old women in my books become young women on the covers... this is discrimination against the chronologically gifted.
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Privilege (to the privileged) means having private laws.
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His progress through life was hampered by his tremendous sense of his own ignorance, a disability which affects all too few.
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She was also, by the standards of other people, lost. She would not see it like that. She knew where she was, it was just that everywhere else didn't.
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I particularly admire are Mark Twain and Jerome K. Jerome who wrote in a certain tone of voice which was humane and understanding of humanity, but always ready to annotate its little foibles. I think I'd lay my cards down on that, and say that it's that that I'm trying to do.
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Young adults that actually read are reading bodice rippers and best-sellers and me. And Horror.
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It's not morbid to talk about death. Most people don't worry about death, they worry about a bad death.
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