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Just call in at the torturer on your way out. See when he can fit you in.

Terry Pratchett

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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Call
Way
Torturer
Fit

More quotes by Terry Pratchett

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A number of religions in Ankh-Morpork still practiced human sacrifice, except that they didn't really need to practice any more because they had got so good at it.
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Just because someone's a member of an ethnic minority doesn't mean they're not a nasty small-minded little jerk [...]
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Cats gravitate to kitchens like rocks gravitate to gravity.
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No one knew where you were before you were born, but when you were born, it wasn't long before you found you'd arrived with your return ticket already punched.
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There have been better attempts at marching, and they have been made by penguins.
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Quit while you're a head, that's what I say.
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One day a tortoise will learn how to fly.
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She heard him mutter, 'Can you take away this grief?' 'I'm sorry,' she replied. 'Everyone asks me. And I would not do so even if I knew how. It belongs to you. Only time and tears take away grief that is what they are for.
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I dinna trust him, said Slightly Mad Angus. He reads books an' such.
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Lord Vetinari lifted an eyebrow with the care of one who, having found a piece of caterpillar in his salad, raises the rest of the lettuce.
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Around it are those countries which, according to History, constitute the civilised world ie, a world that can support historians
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It’s quite easy to accidentally overhear people talking downstairs if you hold an upturned glass to the floorboards and accidentally put your ear to it.
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There is always time for another last minute
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There have been times, lately, when I dearly wished that I could change the past. Well, I can’t, but I can change the present, so that when it becomes the past it will turn out to be a past worth having.
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People don't alter history any more than birds alter the sky, they just make brief patterns in it.
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Imagination is only intelligence having fun. A healthy mind knows how to switch between worlds, and which one you need to eat and sleep in.
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My own books drive themselves. I know roughly where a book is going to end, but essentially the story develops under my fingers. It's just a matter of joining the dots.
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Shoes, men, coffins never accept the first one you see.
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I tell you, commander, it's true that some of the most terrible things in the world are done by people who think, genuinely think, that they're doing it for the best, especially if there is some god involved.
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I read anything that’s going to be interesting. But you don’t know what it is until you’ve read it. Somewhere in a book on the history of false teeth there’ll be the making of a novel.
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