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The muscles used to make a smile actually send a biochemical message to our nervous system that it is safe to relax the flight of freeze response.
Tara Brach
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Tara Brach
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: May 17
Peace Activist
Psychologist
Teacher
System
Send
Actually
Flight
Used
Nervous
Make
Message
Messages
Biochemical
Response
Freeze
Smile
Muscles
Safe
Relax
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Observing desire without acting on it enlarges our freedom to choose how we live.
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Awakening self-compassion is often the greatest challenge people face on the spiritual path.
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If [kids] get into loving relationships, they're afraid they'll be found wanting, won't have the looks or body shape our culture deems worthy. Many of us feel we're falling short and if we start feeling close to another person, that we'll be found out and rejected.
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There's healthy attachment, like with a mother and child. It's biologically part of our survival.
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That non-attachment gives us the freedom to be exactly who we are.
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But this revolutionary act of treating ourselves tenderly can begin to undo the aversive messages of a lifetime.
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I registered the dukkha of self-aversion with such clarity that I knew there was no freedom unless I could love this life without holding back. This didn't mean I was going to ignore my flaws and stop seeking to improve what I could. But in the deepest way, I was not going to fixate on the conclusion that something was wrong with me.
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There is something wonderfully bold and liberating about saying yes to our entire imperfect and messy life.
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If we're not open to losing, we're not open to loving.
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Along with judging myself harshly, I'd also always seen the truth of goodness in me.
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The renowned seventh-century Zen master Seng-tsan taught that true freedom is being without anxiety about imperfection.
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People don't behave in angry ways unless they are feeling stressed and conflicted too.
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Meditation can change the flavor of the season.
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When we open to love, we become love.
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As long as we are alive, we feel fear. It is an intrinsic part of our makeup, as natural as a bitter cold winter day or the winds that rip branches off trees. If we resist it or push it aside, we miss a powerful opportunity for awakening.
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There are some things we can't choose, but in being present we can choose how we want to relate to them
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I knew I could hold myself with that absolute love and compassion.
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This is for anyone reading this who wants to explore it. Recognize the thought, Afraid of loving, then gently put your hand on your heart to send a message of kindness.
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Meditation helps us gain the capacity to relax, to connect with what is going on right here and right now, to connect with other people, to re-access our resourcefulness, our clarity and our ability to focus and keep an open heart.
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Telling each other the truth and being who we are, and having space for the other person's vulnerability in being who they are, allows us to move in a kind of dance together that's very fluid and graceful.
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