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I don't know when it started - this thing - bit it's growing, muffling me, suffocating me like poison ivy. I grew into it. It grew into me. We blurred at the edges, became an amorphous, seeping, crawling thing.

Tabitha Suzuma

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Tabitha Suzuma
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: January 1
Writer
London
England
Tabitha Sayo Victoria Anne Suzuma
Like
Poison
Edges
Became
Seeping
Grew
Amorphous
Started
Blurred
Bits
Suffocating
Growing
Ivy
Thing
Crawling

More quotes by Tabitha Suzuma

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And this is something I must accept - even if, like acid on metal, it is slowly corroding me inside.
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I would give anything to escape myself, Flynn thought, just for a day, just for a minute even. Just to know what it was like to think differently, to feel differently, and to not be me.
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The sight of such aching beauty would infuse his soul with pain.
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Pressed up against him, I can feel the thud of his heart against mine, his ribcase expanding and contracting rapidly against my chest, the warm whisper of his breath tickling the side of my neck, the brush of his leg against my thigh. Resting my arms on his shoulders, I pull back a little to get a look at his face. But he isn't smiling any more.
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Lochie. The boy I once loved. The boy I still love. The boy I will continue to love, even when my part in this world is over too.
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Willa’s big blue eyes, Willa’s dimpled-cheeked smile. Tiffin’s shaggy blond mane, Tiffin’s cheeky grin. Kit’s yells of excitement, Kit’s glow of pride. Maya’s face, Maya’s kisses, Maya’s love. Maya, Maya, Maya . . .
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I might appear confident and chatty, but I spend most of my time laughing at jokes I don't find funny, saying things I don't really mean - because at the end of the day that's what we're all trying to do: fit in, one way or another, desperately trying to pretend we're all the same.
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But I don't want to be fine, not if it means she's going to let go of my hand not if it means we're going to go back to being polite strangers.
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This is the definition of happiness: a whole day stretching out ahead of me, beautiful in its emptiness and simplicity.
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At the end of the day it's about how much you can bear, how much you can endure. Being together, we harm nobody being apart, we extinguish ourselves.
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You cannot undo the past you can only learn to live with it, find some way of making peace with it, and move on.
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It's horrible being ashamed of someone you care about it eats away at you. And if you let it get to you, if you give up the fight and surrender, eventually that shame turns to hate.
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Otherwise I'll fall apart. I'm going to fall apart. I am falling apart.
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...and my loneliness, always my loneliness - that airless bubble of despair that is slowing stifling me.
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What else could he possibly have done? What choices did he ever have?
Tabitha Suzuma
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I love you in–in every kind of way.’ ‘I feel like that too . . .’ His voice is shocked and raw. ‘It’s – it’s a feeling so big I sometimes think it’s going to swalow me. It’s so strong I feel it could kil me. It keeps growing and I can’t – I don’t know what to do to stop it. But – but we’re not supposed to do this – to love each other like this!
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He will think Lochan wasn't loved, but he was, more deeply than most people are in a lifetime.
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Trying to describe my life and feelings to you is like trying to describe coulours to the blind, or music to the deaf. It's simply not possible.
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I can’t tell you. I can’t tell you of all people. Throughout my life you were the one person I could turn to. The one person I could always count on to understand. And now that I’ve lost you, I’ve lost everything.
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Before there was anything, there was Lochan.
Tabitha Suzuma