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I am disabused of all faith, and see too clearly.

Sylvia Plath

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Sylvia Plath
Age: 30 †
Born: 1932
Born: October 27
Died: 1963
Died: February 11
Autobiographer
Diarist
Essayist
Novelist
Poet
Writer
Boston
Massachusetts
Victoria Lucas
Sylvia Plath Hughes
Clearly
Faith

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I need more than anything right now what is, of course, most impossible, someone to love me, to be with me at night when I wake up in shuddering horror and fear of the cement tunnels leading down to the shock room, to comfort me with an assurance that no psychiatrist can quite manage to convey.
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I've got to have something. I want to stop it all, the whole monumental grotesque joke, before it's too late. But writing poems and letters doesn't seem to do much good.
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I collect men with interesting names.
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Before I give my body, I must give my thoughts, my mind, my dreams.
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Whenever I'm sad I'm going to die, or so nervous I can't sleep, or in love with somebody I won't be seeing for a week, I slump down just so far and then I say: 'I'll go take a hot bath.
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Don't let the wicked city get you down.
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With me, the present is forever, and forever is always shifting, flowing, melting. This second is life. And when it is gone it is dead. But you can't start over with each new second. You have to judge by what is dead. It's like quicksand... hopeless from the start.
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Every day is precious and I feel infinitely sad at this time melting away from me.
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I have been holding a dialogue with myself and girding myself to stand fast without running.
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The blood of love welled up in my heart with a slow pain.
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... stop trying to get me to write about 'decent courageous people' -- read the Ladies' Home Journal for those! ... I believe in going through and facing the worst, not hiding from it.
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What is my life for and what am I going to do with it? I don't know and I'm afraid.
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I think I am worthwhile just because I have optical nerves and can try to put down what they perceive. What a fool!
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Even amidst fierce flames the golden lotus can be planted.
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God has to remind us this isn't heaven by a long shot, so he increases the radios and lethal flies.
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I decided I would put off the novel until I had gone to Europe and had a lover, and that I would never learn a word of shorthand. If I never learned shorthand I would never have to use it.
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What I want back is what I was Before the bed, before the knife, Before the brooch-pin and the salve Fixed me in this parenthesis Horses fluent in the wind, A place, a time gone out of mind.
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The sickness rolled through me in great waves. After each wave it would fade away and leave me limp as a wet leaf and shivering all over and then I would feel it rising up in me again, and the glittering white torture chamber tiles under my feet and over my head and all four sides closed in and squeezed me to pieces.
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I have never found anybody who could stand to accept the daily demonstrative love I feel in me, and give back as good as I give.
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A million years of evolution, Eric said bitterly, and what are we? Animals.
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