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I had hoped, at my departure, I would feel sure and knowledgeable about everything that lay ahead -- after all, I had been analyzed. Instead, all I could see were question marks.
Sylvia Plath
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Sylvia Plath
Age: 30 †
Born: 1932
Born: October 27
Died: 1963
Died: February 11
Autobiographer
Diarist
Essayist
Novelist
Poet
Writer
Boston
Massachusetts
Victoria Lucas
Sylvia Plath Hughes
Feels
Lays
Would
Ahead
Mark
Instead
Analyzed
Question
Knowledgeable
Sure
Departure
Everything
Hoped
Feel
Marks
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Beached under the spumy blooms, we lie Sea-sick and fever-dry.
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I am so hungry for a big smashing creative burgeoning burdened love.
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I feel occasionally my skull will crack, fatigue is continuous - I only go from less exhausted to more exhausted & back again.
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I love life. But it is hard and I have so much, so very much to learn.
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No day is safe from news of you.
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God, if ever I have come close to wanting to commit suicide, it is now, with the groggy sleepless blood dragging through my veins, and the air thick and gray with rain ... I fell into bed again this morning, begging for sleep, withdrawing into the dark, warm, fetid escape from action, from responsibility. No good.
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Only I wasn't steering anything, not even myself.
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Poetry, I feel, is a tyrannical discipline. You've got to go so far, so fast, in such a small space, that you've got to burn away all the peripherals.
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Is anyone anywhere happy?
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I began to think vodka was my drink at last. It didn’t taste like anything, but it went straight down into my stomach like a sword swallowers’ sword and made me feel powerful and godlike.
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I desire the things that will destroy me in the end.
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I am disabused of all faith, and see too clearly.
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I would say everything should be able to come into a poem, but I can't put toothbrushes into a poem, I really can't!
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I have no preconceptions. Whatever I see, I swallow immediately. Just as it is, unmisted by love or dislike. I am not cruel, only truthful.
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I could never be a complete scholar or a complete housewife ora completewriter: Imustcombinea little of all, and thereby be imperfect in all.
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Hour by hour, day by day, life becomes possible.
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I took a deep breath and listened to the old bray of my heart. I am. I am. I am.
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The sickness rolled through me in great waves. After each wave it would fade away and leave me limp as a wet leaf and shivering all over and then I would feel it rising up in me again, and the glittering white torture chamber tiles under my feet and over my head and all four sides closed in and squeezed me to pieces.
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A million years of evolution, Eric said bitterly, and what are we? Animals.
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If only a group of people were more important to me than the idea of a Novel, I might begin a novel.
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