Quote

There is so much hurt in this game of searching for a mate, of testing, trying. And you realize suddenly that you forgot it was a game, and turn away in tears.

Sylvia Plath

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Sylvia Plath
Age: 30 †
Born: 1932
Born: October 27
Died: 1963
Died: February 11
Autobiographer
Diarist
Essayist
Novelist
Poet
Writer
Boston
Massachusetts
Victoria Lucas
Sylvia Plath Hughes
Much
Realizing
Mates
Turn
Testing
Hurt
Searching
Games
Dating
Turns
Suddenly
Inspirational
Tears
Away
Realize
Mate
Trying
Game
Forgot

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Why the hell are we conditioned into the smooth strawberry-and-cream Mother-Goose-world, Alice-in-Wonderland fable, only to be broken on the wheel as we grow older and become aware of ourselves as individuals with a dull responsibility in life?
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But everybody has exactly the same smiling frightened face, with the look that says: I'm important. If you only get to know me, you will see how important I am. Look into my eyes. Kiss me, and you will see how important I am.
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My life is a discipline, a prison: I live for my own work, without which I am nothing.
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…'It always has to end, doesn't it? We always have to separate.' 'Yes,' I said. He was insistent, 'But it doesn't always have to be that way. We could be together some day for always.' 'Oh, no,' I told him, wondering if he knew it was all over. 'We keep running till we die. We separate, get further apart, till we are dead.
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The box is only temporary.
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I want to kill myself, to escape from responsiblity, to crawl abjectly back into the womb.
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Feel oddly barren. My sickness is when words draw in their horns and the physical world refuses to be ordered, recreated, arranged and selected. I am a victim of it then, not a master.
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That afternoon my mother had brought me the roses. Save them for my funeral, I'd said.
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Slowly, slowly, catch the monkey.
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When they asked me what I wanted to be I said I didn't know.
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Secretly, in studies and attics and schoolrooms all over America, people must be writing.
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I felt the mask crumple, the great poisonous store of corrosive ashes begin to spew out of my mouth.
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After all, we are nothing more or less than we choose to reveal.
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I never feel so much myself as when I'm in a hot bath.
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Doing all the little tricky things it takes to grow up, step by step, into an anxious and unsettling world.
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I wonder about all the roads not taken and am moved to quote Frost...but won't. It is sad to be able only to mouth other poets. I want someone to mouth me.
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Go out and do something. It isn’t your room that’s a prison, it’s yourself.
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Why honey, don't you want to get dressed? My mother took care never to tell me to do anything. She would only reason with me sweetly, like one intelligent, mature person with another. It's almost three in the afternoon. I'm writing a novel, I said. I haven't got time to change into this and change into that.
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Love is a shadow. How you lie and cry after it
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The thought that I might kill myself formed in my mind coolly as a tree or a flower.
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