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Mummy’s coming home late tonight. It’ll be just we guys, so we can get drunk and watch porn.

Susan Elizabeth Phillips

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Susan Elizabeth Phillips
Age: 75
Born: 1948
Born: December 11
Novelist
Writer
Cincinnati
Ohio
Coming
Porn
Guy
Mummy
Home
Tonight
Drunk
Guys
Watches
Watch
Late

More quotes by Susan Elizabeth Phillips

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If I told you, you might be forced to lie about it. Not that you aren't really good at it, but why put an old man in that position?
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Anything worth having is worth fighting for.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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wouldn't you like to make sure all those millions you give to Uncle Sam went to schools and hospitals instead of nuclear warheads?' As a matter of fact, he would. Playgrounds for big kids, preschool programs to little ones, and mandatory LASIK surgery for NFL refs.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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For a moment he could have sworn he smelled violets, which was very peculiar, since he had no idea what violets smelled like, except somehow he knew they smelled just like Lady Emma.
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I hate to admit this, but some days hearing about other people's problems actually cheers me up.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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I don't care how much evidence the state presented. I've never for one moment believed he murdered that waitress.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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It runs in the family. And don't expect me to be ashamed. Yankees lock away loony relatives, but down here, we prop 'em up on parade floats and march 'em through the middle of town.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Phoebe tapped the toe of her sneaker against the dock. “There’s only one good use for a man like Heath Champion.” “Here we go again,” Molly muttered. Phoebe’s lip curled. “Target practice.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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ignore the pain, play through it.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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[Bobby Tom] finally understood Gracie's function in his life. She was God's joke on him.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Ironic, isn't it, what religion does to people? I guess it's more ironic what people do to religion.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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A villain always preferred luring the heroine to his lair.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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This is America. We’re entitled to our opinions.” “Wrong. This is Texas. And my opinion is the only one that counts.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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It must be hard being you,” she said. “Mr. Perfect on the outside. Dr. Evil on the inside.” “It’s not that hard. The rest of the world isn’t as insightful as you.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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In case you still haven't figured it out, he loves you. Your tiger will be back in the morning, and you can thank me anytime. Now, do I have to paint another picture for you, or do you think you can take it from here by yourself without screwing up?
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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You know that we've got a few problems we need to talk through before we get married. I'm not getting rid of Pooh. See, there you go being antagonistic. Marriage means learning to compromise. I didn't say I wouldn't compromise. I promise to take the ribbon out of her topknot before you walk her.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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I love you, Meg. I want to marry you. I want to sleep with you every night, make love with you, have kids. I want to fight together and work together and—just be together. Now are you going to keep standing there, staring at me, or could you put me out of my misery and say you still love me, at least a little?
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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They've drunk everything in the house, including a pitcher of African violet plant food I'd just mixed up and was stupid enough to leave on the counter. Tremaine punched Eddie in the shoulder. I told you it tasted weird. Eddie shrugged. Tasted okay to me.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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It was a kiss made in lonely dreams. A kiss that took its time. A kiss that felt so right she couldn't remember all the reasons it was wrong.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Bobby Tom told me he’s not afraid of the Chargers’ defense. Bobby Tom’ll tell you he’s not afraid of nuclear war, so I wouldn’t put too much stock in his opinion.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips