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Mummy’s coming home late tonight. It’ll be just we guys, so we can get drunk and watch porn.

Susan Elizabeth Phillips

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Susan Elizabeth Phillips
Age: 75
Born: 1948
Born: December 11
Novelist
Writer
Cincinnati
Ohio
Watches
Watch
Late
Coming
Porn
Guy
Mummy
Home
Tonight
Drunk
Guys

More quotes by Susan Elizabeth Phillips

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There was something about a man with a shovel, and the sweat on his neck might as well have been chocolate sauce. It wasn't fair. Brains and brawns should be two separate categories, not bundled into one irresistible package. She needed to pull herself together before she went after him with a spoon. But where to start?
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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I take thee... to be my awful wedded husband
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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I finally figured out that not every crisis can be managed. As much as we want to keep ourselves safe, we can't protect ourselves from everything. If we want to embrace life, we also have to embrace chaos.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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The question is… How did a girl like Annabelle manage to talk a man like you into joining our silly little family party?” Annabelle smiled sweetly. “I promised he could tie me up afterward and spank me.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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He shook his head. The next time I hear a women going on about how neurotic men are, I'm going to remember this. You tell me you like my body, and what do I say? I say, thank you. Then I tell you I like yours and what do I hear? A long lists of grievances.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Cal ’s eyes reflected a weird combination of frenzy and fear as he twisted toward his father. “My God! She’s on her way to becoming the most famous physicist in the country, and she’sdumb as a post ! You arenot having your baby in this house! You’re having it at the county hospital!
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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I always want to try to bring something fresh to every book. It's getting harder instead of easier. I feel like I work harder with each book. But I don't want it to show on the pages, that's for sure.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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There’s no accounting for the mysteries of the human heart
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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I married a damned cereal killer
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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The engine roared to life. He ran toward her. She shot our of her parking space. He rushed to the side of her car. Stop it, Kristy! You're overreacting! Let's talk about this. That was when she did the unthinkable. She rolled down the window, thrust out her hand, and gave Reverend Ethan Bonner the bird.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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No marshmallows. I don't believe this! I'm going to write the president of General Mills! Don't they have any quality control? I'm sure it's just a fluke Doesn't make any difference whether it's a fluke or not. It shouldn't have happened. When a person buys a box of lucky charms he's got expectations
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Why don't I just hand you my panties and be done with it.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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I guess we're oil and water. (Phoebe) I'd say we're more like gasoline and a blowtorch. (Dan)
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Anything worth having is worth fighting for.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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If you think I'm going to cry all over your chest because you don't feel the same way, you're wrong. I don't beg for anybody's love.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Get inside before I spank you in public. There it was again, another of his maddening threats. Did that mean he wouldn't spank her if she did as he said or that he simply planned to spank her in private? She was still mulling over the whole unpleasant concept when he started the truck.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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It runs in the family. And don't expect me to be ashamed. Yankees lock away loony relatives, but down here, we prop 'em up on parade floats and march 'em through the middle of town.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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[Bobby Tom] finally understood Gracie's function in his life. She was God's joke on him.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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I write about the men you want to read about but don't necessarily want to be married to.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Pride had kept her running when love had betrayed her.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips