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Before you lost your mind, how did you make a living? I was a hitman for the Mafia. Are you done crying yet? I wasn't crying! And I wish you were a hitman because, if I had money, I'd hire you right this minute to knock yourself off.

Susan Elizabeth Phillips

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Susan Elizabeth Phillips
Age: 75
Born: 1948
Born: December 11
Novelist
Writer
Cincinnati
Ohio
Mind
Minutes
Make
Wasn
Hitman
Wish
Mafia
Living
Knock
Lost
Hire
Money
Crying
Done
Minute
Right
Cry

More quotes by Susan Elizabeth Phillips

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I hate to admit this, but some days hearing about other people's problems actually cheers me up.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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You lit into me last night. You said what I did was stupid. - That's what my head said. But my heart... My stupid heart... Her voice broke. It was singing.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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A villain always preferred luring the heroine to his lair.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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She glared at him. You're doing it again. What? That thing that irritates me. Smiling? Yes. That.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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If you want me, you'll have to earn me. And, mister, I don't come cheap.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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It must be hard being you,” she said. “Mr. Perfect on the outside. Dr. Evil on the inside.” “It’s not that hard. The rest of the world isn’t as insightful as you.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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I think this is the way love feels to people like you and me. Threatening and dangerous. We have to be in control, and love takes that away. People like us… We can't tolerate vulnerability. But despite our best efforts, sooner or later love seems to catch up with us. And then…And then we fall apart.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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He shook his head. The next time I hear a women going on about how neurotic men are, I'm going to remember this. You tell me you like my body, and what do I say? I say, thank you. Then I tell you I like yours and what do I hear? A long lists of grievances.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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You know that we've got a few problems we need to talk through before we get married. I'm not getting rid of Pooh. See, there you go being antagonistic. Marriage means learning to compromise. I didn't say I wouldn't compromise. I promise to take the ribbon out of her topknot before you walk her.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Meg! I love you! I want to marry you! That's weird, she said without stopping. Only six weeks ago, you were telling me all about how Lucy broke your heart. I was wrong. Lucy broke my brain.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Get inside before I spank you in public. There it was again, another of his maddening threats. Did that mean he wouldn't spank her if she did as he said or that he simply planned to spank her in private? She was still mulling over the whole unpleasant concept when he started the truck.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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If I told you, you might be forced to lie about it. Not that you aren't really good at it, but why put an old man in that position?
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Anything worth having is worth fighting for.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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I'm just very, very slow. I would not make it as a journalist, I've got to tell you. I sweat bullets over every sentence, and sometimes, you know, a day will pass and I've written one paragraph, and I've been at the computer for four hours.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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In case you still haven't figured it out, he loves you. Your tiger will be back in the morning, and you can thank me anytime. Now, do I have to paint another picture for you, or do you think you can take it from here by yourself without screwing up?
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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For a moment he could have sworn he smelled violets, which was very peculiar, since he had no idea what violets smelled like, except somehow he knew they smelled just like Lady Emma.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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I finally figured out that not every crisis can be managed. As much as we want to keep ourselves safe, we can't protect ourselves from everything. If we want to embrace life, we also have to embrace chaos.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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You never get mad,” she said when their server left the table. “Except at me.” “That’s not true,” he said tightly. “Torie can get me going.” “Torie doesn’t count. You were obviously her mother in a previous life.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Bobby Tom told me he’s not afraid of the Chargers’ defense. Bobby Tom’ll tell you he’s not afraid of nuclear war, so I wouldn’t put too much stock in his opinion.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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When it's your fourth marriage, you tend to lose faith in superstitions.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips