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Don't mess with me, Calvin. You'll only get hurt.

Susan Elizabeth Phillips

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Susan Elizabeth Phillips
Age: 75
Born: 1948
Born: December 11
Novelist
Writer
Cincinnati
Ohio
Calvin
Mess
Hurt

More quotes by Susan Elizabeth Phillips

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Bobby Tom told me he’s not afraid of the Chargers’ defense. Bobby Tom’ll tell you he’s not afraid of nuclear war, so I wouldn’t put too much stock in his opinion.
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I don't care how much evidence the state presented. I've never for one moment believed he murdered that waitress.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Did anybody tell you that you're a few french fries short of a Happy Meal?
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If you want me, you'll have to earn me. And, mister, I don't come cheap.
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This is America. We’re entitled to our opinions.” “Wrong. This is Texas. And my opinion is the only one that counts.
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If you think I'm going to cry all over your chest because you don't feel the same way, you're wrong. I don't beg for anybody's love.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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They've drunk everything in the house, including a pitcher of African violet plant food I'd just mixed up and was stupid enough to leave on the counter. Tremaine punched Eddie in the shoulder. I told you it tasted weird. Eddie shrugged. Tasted okay to me.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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I married a damned cereal killer
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I finally figured out that not every crisis can be managed. As much as we want to keep ourselves safe, we can't protect ourselves from everything. If we want to embrace life, we also have to embrace chaos.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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[Bobby Tom] finally understood Gracie's function in his life. She was God's joke on him.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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For a moment he could have sworn he smelled violets, which was very peculiar, since he had no idea what violets smelled like, except somehow he knew they smelled just like Lady Emma.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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If I told you, you might be forced to lie about it. Not that you aren't really good at it, but why put an old man in that position?
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Get inside before I spank you in public. There it was again, another of his maddening threats. Did that mean he wouldn't spank her if she did as he said or that he simply planned to spank her in private? She was still mulling over the whole unpleasant concept when he started the truck.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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You’re the most important thing in the world to me. I know you don’t believe it, but I’m going to prove it to you.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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My website bulletin board is the place I interact with my readers.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Pride had kept her running when love had betrayed her.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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wouldn't you like to make sure all those millions you give to Uncle Sam went to schools and hospitals instead of nuclear warheads?' As a matter of fact, he would. Playgrounds for big kids, preschool programs to little ones, and mandatory LASIK surgery for NFL refs.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Who needs food? Your smile alone is enough to nourish me for weeks.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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I think this is the way love feels to people like you and me. Threatening and dangerous. We have to be in control, and love takes that away. People like us… We can't tolerate vulnerability. But despite our best efforts, sooner or later love seems to catch up with us. And then…And then we fall apart.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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In case you still haven't figured it out, he loves you. Your tiger will be back in the morning, and you can thank me anytime. Now, do I have to paint another picture for you, or do you think you can take it from here by yourself without screwing up?
Susan Elizabeth Phillips