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If you got into a taxi and the driver started driving backward, would the taxi driver end up owing you money?
Steven Wright
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Steven Wright
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Drivers
Driving
Humor
Started
Funny
Owing
Money
Taxi
Ends
Backward
Would
Driver
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Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
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My school colors were clear. We used to say, 'I'm not naked, I'm in the band.
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What a nice night for an evening.
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Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.
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If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet?
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Imagine how weird phones would look if your mouth was nowhere near your ears.
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I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'
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To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism to steal from many is research.
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I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'll use it.
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I have all the emotions that everyone has it just appears that I don't.
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If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
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I saw a vegetarian wearing a furry coat. so I looked closer. it was made of grass.
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If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?
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I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out.
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If it's a penny for your thoughts and you put in your two cents worth, then someone, somewhere is making a penny.
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