Quote

Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

Steven Wright

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Steven Wright
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Sterilize
Injections
Injection
Lethal
Needles
Humor
Funny

More quotes by Steven Wright

Image
I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
Steven Wright
Image
Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.
Steven Wright
Image
I got a chain letter by fax. It's very simple. You just fax a dollar bill to everybody on the list.
Steven Wright
Image
I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography.
Steven Wright
Image
I told her I knew when I was going to die because my birth certificate had an expiration date on it.
Steven Wright
Image
Imagine how weird phones would look if your mouth was nowhere near your ears.
Steven Wright
Image
So I got off the plane and I forget to take off my seat-belt and I'm dragging the plane through the terminal... The wings are knocking people over.
Steven Wright
Image
After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting out of the water?
Steven Wright
Image
I'm used to seeing it, but it's weird having an Academy Award. You usually only see one of them on the TV show when they give them out, so it's kind of surreal to have one in your house.
Steven Wright
Image
If God dropped acid, would he see people?
Steven Wright
Image
What do batteries run on?
Steven Wright
Image
I’m a psychic amnesiac. I know in advance what I’ll forget.
Steven Wright
Image
A friend of mine once sent me a post card with a picture of the entire planet Earth taken from space. On the back it said, 'Wish you were here.
Steven Wright
Image
I feel very lucky to make a living from my imagination I'm very grateful for that. I like that what I do is create. I'm feeling very lucky to have had the career I had. It's gone much longer and bigger than I ever thought it would be.
Steven Wright
Image
If it’s zero degrees outside today and it’s supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
Steven Wright
Image
I just got out of the hospital. I was in a speed-reading accident. I hit a bookmark.
Steven Wright
Image
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
Steven Wright
Image
Black holes result from God dividing the universe by zero.
Steven Wright
Image
A fool and his money are soon partying.
Steven Wright
Image
I've never seen electricity, that's why I don't pay for it
Steven Wright