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I like to go to art museums and name the untitled paintings... Boy With Pail... Kitten On Fire.

Steven Wright

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Steven Wright
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Art
Museums
Like
Painting
Humor
Boys
Name
Untitled
Fire
Pail
Names
Kitten
Funny
Paintings

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Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.
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Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?
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It was the first time I was ever in love, and I learned a lot. Before that I'd never even thought about killing myself.
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I had just received my degree in Calcium Anthropology... the study of milkmen.
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It's a fine night to have an evening.
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The things I talk about and explain couldn't happen - yet, they don't seem impossible - you could say I talk about the world in an abstract perspective. But then, the world is basically insane - and it's trying to pass itself off as being a sane place. I show it for what it is.
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I had my coat hangers spayed.
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I wrote a few children's books... not on purpose.
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I bought some powdered water, but I don’t know what to add.
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When I was on TV in the '80s, I wasn't thinking, 'There's a 10-year-old kid watching this and in 15 years, he's gonna be doing stuff that was influenced by me.' I was trying to get my five minutes together. So now that those people are comedians and they're influenced by me - it's bizarre.
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If you got into a taxi and the driver started driving backward, would the taxi driver end up owing you money?
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I paint I draw and paint - I've been doing that since I was in third grade, drawing realistically and then changing to abstract art. That was my first creative thing before guitar or comedy.
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Hermits have no peer pressure.
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The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing.
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I'm used to seeing it, but it's weird having an Academy Award. You usually only see one of them on the TV show when they give them out, so it's kind of surreal to have one in your house.
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I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
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Do you have any toy train schedules?
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When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask if I'm leaving.
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Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.
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always remember your unique, just like everone else
Steven Wright