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Do you have any toy train schedules?

Steven Wright

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Steven Wright
Age: 68
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Schedules
Toys
Train

More quotes by Steven Wright

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You know how it is when you're reading a book and falling asleep, you're reading, reading... and all of a sudden you notice your eyes are closed? I'm like that all the time.
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Whatever happened to preparations A through G?
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I wear my heart on my sleeve. I wear my liver on my pant leg.
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I wrote a few children's books... not on purpose.
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If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
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I took a baby shower.
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I went to a general store but they wouldn't let me buy anything specific.
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OK, so what's the speed of dark?
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I rented a lottery ticket. I won a million dollars. But I had to give it back.
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Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
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Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring... 'How to Build a Boat.'
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Your honor, why would anyone in their right mind park in the passing lane?
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I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
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I have a map of the united states .... it's original size ... it says one mile equals one mile.
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Do Roman paramedics refer to IV’s as '4's'?
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If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?
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I turned my air conditioner the other way around and it got cold out. The weatherman said 'I don't understand it. It was supposed to be 80 degrees out today.' I said, oops
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I don't get up, get dressed, go out, and think, 'Okay, I gotta find eight jokes.'
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Yeah, but I don't believe everything I read.
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My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted.
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