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If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

Steven Wright

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Steven Wright
Age: 68
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Stills
Still
Men
Apes
Evolved
Monkeys
Humor
Funny

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If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
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To the audience, it's like I'm changing the subject every five seconds, but to me, my show's almost like a 90-minute song that I know exactly. I wrote every note, and I know exactly where everything is.
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I got a new shadow. I had to get rid of the other one – it wasn’t doing what I was doing.
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I was born. When I was 23 I started telling jokes. Then I started going on television and doing films. That's still what I am doing. The end.
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In Vegas, I got into a long argument with the man at the roulette wheel over what I considered to be an odd number.
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My friend Sam has one leg. I went to his house. I couldn't go up the stairs.
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I live at the end of a dead end one way street. I don't know how I got there.
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I feel lucky that I can have people laugh solidly for a whole hour by just saying what I think and getting paid for it.
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In hindsight, I realized I could see into the future. Which is kind of like having premonitions of flashbacks.
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I bought some powdered water, but I don’t know what to add.
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Don't you hate when your hand falls asleep and you know it will be up all night.
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I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates.
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