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Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

Steven Wright

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Steven Wright
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Depression
Psychological
Enthusiasm
Anger
Merely
Angry
Without
Sarcasm
Sarcastic

More quotes by Steven Wright

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If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
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Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.
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My grandfather gave me a watch. It doesn't have any hands or numbers. He says it's very accurate. I asked him what time it was. You can guess what he told me.
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I like to go to art museums and name the untitled paintings... Boy With Pail... Kitten On Fire.
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If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?
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I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
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Winny would spend all of his time practicing limbo. He got pretty good. He could go under a rug.
Steven Wright
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OK, so what's the speed of dark?
Steven Wright
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I was always making my friends laugh but I never wanted the attention of the whole classroom.
Steven Wright
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I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography.
Steven Wright
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So I got off the plane and I forget to take off my seat-belt and I'm dragging the plane through the terminal... The wings are knocking people over.
Steven Wright
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I once tried to commit suicide by jumping off a building...I changed my mind at the last minute, so I just flipped over and landed on my feet. Two little kittens nearby saw what happened and one turns to the other and says, See, that's how it's done.
Steven Wright
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I have two pairs of reading glasses. One pair is for reading fiction, the other for non-fiction. I've read the Bible twice wearing each pair, and it's the same.
Steven Wright
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I took a baby shower.
Steven Wright
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The other day I ... no wait, that wasn't me.
Steven Wright
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Day One: Still tired from the move.
Steven Wright
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I put a new engine in my car, but forgot to take the old one out. Now my car goes 500 miles per hour. The harmonica sounds amazing.
Steven Wright
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I look like a casual, laid-back guy, but it's like a circus in my head.
Steven Wright
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Consciousness: That annoying time between naps
Steven Wright
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Is it weird in here, or is it just me?
Steven Wright