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I have a map of the United States... Actual size. It says, 'Scale: 1 mile = 1 mile.' I spent last summer folding it. I hardly ever unroll it. People ask me where I live, and I say, 'E6.

Steven Wright

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Steven Wright
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Asks
Scales
Lasts
Hardly
Last
Actual
United
Miles
States
Spent
Folding
Ever
Size
Mile
Live
Summer
Maps
People
Says
Scale

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It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it.
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My act is an exaggeration of a part of me. I'm much more expressive off stage.
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Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.
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When I was ten, my pa told me never to talk to strangers. We haven't spoken since.
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In my house on the ceilings I have paintings of the rooms above... so I never have to go upstairs.
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I got a garage door opener. It can't close. Just open.
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If I ever had twins, I'd use one for parts.
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I'm used to seeing it, but it's weird having an Academy Award. You usually only see one of them on the TV show when they give them out, so it's kind of surreal to have one in your house.
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