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Is 'tired old cliché' one?

Steven Wright

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Steven Wright
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Tired
Clich

More quotes by Steven Wright

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The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing.
Steven Wright
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My aunt gave me a walkie-talkie for my birthday. She says if I'm good, she'll give me the other one next year.
Steven Wright
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My neighbor has a circular driveway... he can't get out.
Steven Wright
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I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, and stick it out the window.
Steven Wright
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If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
Steven Wright
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If I ever had twins, I'd use one for parts.
Steven Wright
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Why, in a country of free speech, are there phone bills?
Steven Wright
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I made a chocolate cake with white chocolate. Then I took it to a potluck. I stood in line for some cake. They said, Do you want white cake or chocolate cake? I said, yes.
Steven Wright
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If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?
Steven Wright
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You know the old joke, I went to the fights and a hockey game broke out.
Steven Wright
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There was a power outage at a department store yesterday. Twenty people were trapped on the escalators.
Steven Wright
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Doing stand-up is like running across a frozen pond with the ice breaking behind you. I love it because it's dangerous.
Steven Wright
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Babies don't need a vacation. But I still see them at the beach. It pisses me off.
Steven Wright
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When I was a kid, I went to the store and asked the guy, Do you have any toy train schedules?
Steven Wright
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If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
Steven Wright
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I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving.
Steven Wright
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I had a dream that all the babies prevented by the pill showed up. They were mad.
Steven Wright
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My friend Sam has one leg. I went to his house. I couldn't go up the stairs.
Steven Wright
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Imagine how weird phones would look if your mouth was nowhere near your ears.
Steven Wright
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My act is an exaggeration of a part of me. I'm much more expressive off stage.
Steven Wright