Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
Is it possible to be totally partial?
Steven Wright
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Steven Wright
Age: 68
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Partial
Totally
Possible
More quotes by Steven Wright
Hermits have no peer pressure.
Steven Wright
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?
Steven Wright
I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
Steven Wright
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
Steven Wright
I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography.
Steven Wright
If God dropped acid, would he see people?
Steven Wright
If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer?
Steven Wright
I am writing a book. So far I have the pages numbered.
Steven Wright
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
Steven Wright
I saw a subliminal advertising executive, but only for a second.
Steven Wright
Why do banks charge you a non-sufficient funds fee on money they already know you don't have?
Steven Wright
Last night somebody broke into my apartment and replaced everything with exact duplicates... When I pointed it out to my roommate, he said, Do I know you?
Steven Wright
Imagine how weird phones would look if your mouth was nowhere near your ears.
Steven Wright
I have two pairs of reading glasses. One pair is for reading fiction, the other for non-fiction. I've read the Bible twice wearing each pair, and it's the same.
Steven Wright
I feel lucky that I can have people laugh solidly for a whole hour by just saying what I think and getting paid for it.
Steven Wright
My friend Sam has one leg. I went to his house. I couldn't go up the stairs.
Steven Wright
I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
Steven Wright
Be nice to your children. After all, they are going to choose your nursing home.
Steven Wright
Do fish get cramps after eating?
Steven Wright
If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?
Steven Wright