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I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

Steven Wright

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Steven Wright
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Unfamiliar
Territory
Humor
Lost
Thought

More quotes by Steven Wright

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I wish, when I was first born, the first thing I said was Quote so the last thing I said before I died would be Unquote.
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Yeah, but I don't believe everything I read.
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Whose cruel idea was it for the word “lisp” to have an “s” in it?
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I need one of those baby monitors from my subconscious to my consciousness so I can know what the hell I'm really thinking about.
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Winny would spend all of his time practicing limbo. He got pretty good. He could go under a rug.
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I forgot and left the lighthouse on all night. Next day the sun wouldn't rise.
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There was a power outage at a department store yesterday. Twenty people were trapped on the escalators.
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For my sister's 50th birthday, I sent her a singing mammogram.
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It doesn't matter what temperature the room is, it's always room temperature.
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I took a baby shower.
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Imagine how weird phones would look if your mouth was nowhere near your ears.
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If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
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I got a chain letter by fax. It's very simple. You just fax a dollar bill to everybody on the list.
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One time the power went out in my house and I had to use the flash on my camera to see my way around. I made a sandwich and took fifty pictures of my face. The neighbors thought there was lightning in my house.
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Five out of four people have trouble with fractions.
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Do you have any toy train schedules?
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I told her I knew when I was going to die because my birth certificate had an expiration date on it.
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I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving.
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Even snakes are afraid of snakes.
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I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'
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