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I feel very lucky to make a living from my imagination I'm very grateful for that. I like that what I do is create. I'm feeling very lucky to have had the career I had. It's gone much longer and bigger than I ever thought it would be.
Steven Wright
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Steven Wright
Age: 68
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
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More quotes by Steven Wright
Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone...when I came back the entire area was missing.
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When I was a fetus, I used to sneak out at night when my mother was sleeping. I figured I should start stealing stuff while I still had no fingerprints.
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The things I talk about and explain couldn't happen - yet, they don't seem impossible - you could say I talk about the world in an abstract perspective. But then, the world is basically insane - and it's trying to pass itself off as being a sane place. I show it for what it is.
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Winny would spend all of his time practicing limbo. He got pretty good. He could go under a rug.
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I like to go to art museums and name the untitled paintings... Boy With Pail... Kitten On Fire.
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I had to stop driving my car for a while... the tires got dizzy.
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A fool and his money are soon partying.
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I've never seen electricity, that's why I don't pay for it
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The sky already fell. Now what?
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I don't get up, get dressed, go out, and think, 'Okay, I gotta find eight jokes.'
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My school colors were clear. We used to say, 'I'm not naked, I'm in the band.
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I hate it when my leg falls asleep. I know that means it's going to be up all night.
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I brought a mirror to Lovers' Lane. I told everybody I'm Narcissus.
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Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
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Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.
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I told her I knew when I was going to die because my birth certificate had an expiration date on it.
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I have not lost my mind - it's backed up on disk somewhere.
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Why are they called buildings when they’re already finished? Shouldn’t they be called builts?
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The sun never sets on the British Empire. But it rises every morning. The sky must get awfully crowded.
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If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?
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