Quote

I don't go off and sit down and try to write material, because then it's contrived and forced. I just live my life, and I see things in a word or a situation or a concept, and it will create a joke for me.

Steven Wright

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Steven Wright
Age: 68
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Live
Concepts
Writing
Material
Trying
Jokes
Things
Materials
Life
Create
Contrived
Situation
Forced
Word
Joke
Write
Concept

More quotes by Steven Wright

Image
Did you sleep well? No, I made a couple of mistakes.
Steven Wright
Image
Last night somebody broke into my apartment and replaced everything with exact duplicates... When I pointed it out to my roommate, he said, Do I know you?
Steven Wright
Image
If heat rises, then heaven must be hotter than hell
Steven Wright
Image
I forgot and left the lighthouse on all night. Next day the sun wouldn't rise.
Steven Wright
Image
So I got off the plane and I forget to take off my seat-belt and I'm dragging the plane through the terminal... The wings are knocking people over.
Steven Wright
Image
I bought a house on a one-way dead-end road. I don’t know how I got there.
Steven Wright
Image
When I was on TV in the '80s, I wasn't thinking, 'There's a 10-year-old kid watching this and in 15 years, he's gonna be doing stuff that was influenced by me.' I was trying to get my five minutes together. So now that those people are comedians and they're influenced by me - it's bizarre.
Steven Wright
Image
I was arrested for lip-syncing karaoke.
Steven Wright
Image
I couldn't find the remote control to the remote control.
Steven Wright
Image
I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone.
Steven Wright
Image
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
Steven Wright
Image
I got an answering machine for my phone. . . . Now, when I'm not home and somebody calls me up . . . they hear a recording of a busy signal.
Steven Wright
Image
Why do banks charge you a non-sufficient funds fee on money they already know you don't have?
Steven Wright
Image
When I turned two I was really anxious, because I'd doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I'm six I'll be ninety.
Steven Wright
Image
If I ever had twins, I'd use one for parts.
Steven Wright
Image
I once locked my keys out of my car. I had to break out of my car with a coat hanger.
Steven Wright
Image
I poured spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
Steven Wright
Image
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?
Steven Wright
Image
I was a peripheral visionary. I could see the future, but only way off to the side.
Steven Wright
Image
Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.
Steven Wright