Quote

I was born. When I was 23 I started telling jokes. Then I started going on television and doing films. That's still what I am doing. The end.

Steven Wright

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Steven Wright
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Stills
Jokes
Still
Telling
Going
Films
Started
Television
Born
Film
Ends

More quotes by Steven Wright

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I poured spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
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When I was a kid I had a friend who worked in a radio station. Whenever we walked under a bridge, you couldn't hear what he said.
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always remember your unique, just like everone else
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Is 'tired old cliché' one?
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Having sex with her is incredible. It's just like a concert. We throw Frisbees around the room. And when she wants more she lights a match.
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I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
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Consciousness: That annoying time between naps
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I saw a sign: Rest Area 25 Miles. That's pretty big. Some people must be really tired.
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OK, so what's the speed of dark?
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I've been doing comedy longer than I haven't been doing comedy, as I was performing for three years before I even got on 'The Tonight Show.' There's truly nothing like it it's intense and exhilarating, even though it looks so casual.
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I saw a vegetarian wearing a furry coat. so I looked closer. it was made of grass.
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My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the apartment somewhere.
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I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
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I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out.
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I thought I would be a guy on the radio.
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Five out of four people have trouble with fractions.
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I've never seen electricity, that's why I don't pay for it
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It doesn't matter what temperature the room is, it's always room temperature.
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I kept a diary right after I was born. Day 1: Tired from the move. Day 2: Everyone thinks I'm an idiot.
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If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
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