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I look like a casual, laid-back guy, but it's like a circus in my head.

Steven Wright

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Steven Wright
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Head
Guy
Back
Look
Looks
Like
Circus
Casual
Laid

More quotes by Steven Wright

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Do fish get cramps after eating?
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I paint I draw and paint - I've been doing that since I was in third grade, drawing realistically and then changing to abstract art. That was my first creative thing before guitar or comedy.
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My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the apartment somewhere.
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I have a fax machine with fax waiting.
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I feel very lucky to make a living from my imagination I'm very grateful for that. I like that what I do is create. I'm feeling very lucky to have had the career I had. It's gone much longer and bigger than I ever thought it would be.
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I have a map of the united states .... it's original size ... it says one mile equals one mile.
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I met this wonderful girl at Macy's. She was buying clothes and I was putting Slinkies on the escalator.
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I can't stop thinking like this.
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They say we're 98% water. We're that close to drowning. I like to live on the edge.
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Imagine Pulitzer prizefighting.
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I got pulled over by a cop, and he said, 'do you know the speed limit here is 55 miles per hour?'. So I said, 'oh, that's OK, I'm not going that far.'
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I washed mud off of mud.
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If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?
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All of the people in my building are insane. The guy above me designs synthetic hairballs for ceramic cats.
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I went to San Francisco. I found someone’s heart.
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Even snakes are afraid of snakes.
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At one point he decided enough was enough.
Steven Wright
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When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask if I'm leaving.
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I couldn't find the remote control to the remote control.
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The sun got confused about daylight savings time. It rose twice. Everything had two shadows.
Steven Wright