Quote

I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, and stick it out the window.

Steven Wright

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Steven Wright
Age: 68
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Window
Humor
Comedy
Harmonicas
Funny
Harmonica
Play
Stick
Going
Sticks
Really
Fast
Way
Car

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It was the first time I was ever in love, and I learned a lot. Before that I'd never even thought about killing myself.
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I have all the emotions that everyone has it just appears that I don't.
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Be nice to your children. After all, they are going to choose your nursing home.
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I like to reminisce with people I don't know.
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Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.
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If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
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The sun got confused about daylight savings time. It rose twice. Everything had two shadows.
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Last night somebody broke into my apartment and replaced everything with exact duplicates... When I pointed it out to my roommate, he said, Do I know you?
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Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.
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Hermits have no peer pressure.
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When I was a kid I had a friend who worked in a radio station. Whenever we walked under a bridge, you couldn't hear what he said.
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I always thought Johnny Carson was just brilliant, and I used to watch him and all the comics that would be on the show every night - and I'd dream about it being me.
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The sky is falling. No, I'm tipping over backwards.
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Babies don't need a vacation. But I still see them at the beach. It pisses me off.
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