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When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child... eventually.
Steven Wright
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Steven Wright
Age: 68
Born: 1955
Born: December 6
Comedian
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Cambridge
Massachusetts
Steven Alexander Wright
Littles
Sand
Little
Boxes
Children
Eventually
Humor
Comedy
Child
Funny
Kids
Quicksand
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Imagine Pulitzer prizefighting.
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I wrote a song, but I can't read music so I don't know what it is. Every once in a while I'll be listening to the radio and I say, I think I might have written that.
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I have a map of the united states .... it's original size ... it says one mile equals one mile.
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I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'll use it.
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When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
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I saw a bank that said '24 Hour Banking,' but I don't have that much time.
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When I was a kid, I went to the store and asked the guy, Do you have any toy train schedules?
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If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?
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I stayed in a really old hotel last night. They sent me a wake-up letter.
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When I erase a word with a pencil, where does it go?
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I've never seen electricity, that's why I don't pay for it
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Four years ago... no, it was yesterday.
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I got a new dog. He's a paranoid retriever. He brings back everything because he's not sure what I threw him.
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