I hate sports. My reaction to the ball is this [kicks soccer ball] Don't kick it back to me. I don't wanna see it again.

I love Krispy Kreme donuts, but doesn't the thought of cream that's crispy just churn your stomach?

As rich as you think some of us are, for every $18.99 CD you buy, the artist usually sees a toonie or so. Pay your producer out of that. Then your manager. Then split it five ways among your band mates. Now don't act surprised when you see the drummer of a platinum-selling Canadian rock band behind the drive- thru window at Tim Hortons

I sometimes think 'Gordon' must be the most bootlegged album in U.S history, since it sold only 200,000 copies in the country, yet 800,000 kids know the words to every song.