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When man invented fire, he didn't say, Hey, let's cook. He said, Great, now we can see naked bottoms in the dark.

Steven Moffat

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Steven Moffat
Age: 63
Born: 1961
Born: November 18
Executive Producer
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Teacher
Television Producer
Television Writer
Paisley
Renfrew
Steven William Moffat
Dark
Blokes
Didn
Cook
Great
Hey
Men
Invented
Cooks
Naked
Bottom
Coupling
Fire
Bottoms

More quotes by Steven Moffat

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I always tend to favor the newer idea.
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You want weapons? We're in a library! Books! The best weapons in the world!
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You'll go out of business if you think people are stupid.
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I don't want to think that the stories are finite I want to feel that they can go on forever.
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Rule 1: The Doctor lies.
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There's one thing you don't put in a trap, if you're smart, if you value your continued existance, if you have any plans about seeing tomorrow, there is one thing you never ever put in a trap. And what would that be sir? Me
Steven Moffat
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We have a plan to top it. And I do think our plan is devastating. We’ve practically reduced our cast to tears telling them the plan … we’re probably more excited that we’ve ever been about Sherlock.
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I always rip out the last page of a book. Then it doesn't have to end. I hate endings!
Steven Moffat
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If you don't expect to like someone and then you do, that's an incredibly exciting moment.
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Don't play games with me! You just killed someone I like, that is not a safe place to stand! I'm the Doctor, and you're in the biggest library in the Universe. Look me up.
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River Song: Right, I have questions. But number one is this: what in the name of sanity have you got on your head? The Doctor: It's a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezzes are cool.
Steven Moffat
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You don't want to take over the universe. You wouldn't know what to do with it beyond shout at it.
Steven Moffat
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All lives end. All hearts are broken. Caring is not an advantage.
Steven Moffat
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It's a TV show. Only the emotional damage is real.
Steven Moffat
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When you're surrounded by friends and exes, there's a whole lot of stuff that starts crawling out. But however serious and traumatic those experiences may be to the participant, to the onlooker they're hilarious.
Steven Moffat
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We're all stories, in the end.
Steven Moffat
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My problem is that the audience is more fiction-literate than ever. In Shakespeare's day, you probably expected to see a play once or twice in your life today you experience four or five different kinds of fiction every day. So staying ahead of the audience is impossible.
Steven Moffat
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The Doctor: 'You know when grown-ups tell you everything's going to be fine, but you really think they're lying to make you feel better?' Amelia: 'Yeah...' The Doctor: 'Everything's going to be fine.
Steven Moffat
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It's a funny thing about stories. It doesn't feel like you make them up, more like you find them. You type and type and you know you haven't got it yet, because somewhere out there, there's that perfect thing -- the unexpected ending that was always going to happen. That place you've always been heading for, but never expected to go.
Steven Moffat
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I think training in comedy, as it were, a history writing comedy, is a powerful tool for anyone.
Steven Moffat