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I started a grease fire at McDonald's - threw a match in the cook's hair.

Steve Martin

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Steve Martin
Age: 79
Born: 1945
Born: August 14
Actor
Art Collector
Banjoist
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Musician
Performing Artist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Street Artist
Waco
Texas
Steve Glenn Martin
Stephen Glenn Martin
Fire
Mcdonald
Grease
Threw
Cook
Match
Cooks
Hair
Started

More quotes by Steve Martin

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With comedy, you never know until you put it in front of an audience. You shoot it and a year later you have no idea if it's going to work. And then you get the response. It's great when it's good.
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Being on Twitter is like having a fern.
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I did stand-up comedy for 18 years. Ten of those years were spent learning, four years were spent refining, and four years were spent in wild success. I was seeking comic originality, and fame fell on me as a byproduct. The course was more plodding than heroic.
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There are few takers for the quiet heart.
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What I mean is that none of my talents had a - what's that great word - rubric. A singer, an actor, a dancer - there was nothing I could really say I was. The writing came much later. And, actually, thank God, because if I had said I'm a singer, I would really have just had one thing to do.
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After one of my plays came out, I had mixed reviews, some bad and some good. One day, it dawned on me. I thought, 'I wrote a play and he wrote a review, and that's the difference between him and me.'
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As a school board we felt it's an unfair expense to families. The lawsuit has a certain logic to it - if you have free public education, you can't put these things on top of it. It defeats the purpose.
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I'm always looking for something to engage my imagination and take me on a little mental voyage. I just want a new topic in my life.
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...the divided world of Aspen, where locals with a sense of entitlement were pitted against developers with a sense of condominiums.
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All of life’s riddles are answered in the movies.
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I realized that comedians of the day were operating on jokes and punch lines. The moment you say the punch line, the audience either laughs sincerely or they laugh automatically or they don't laugh. The thing that bothered me was that automatic laugh. I said, that's not real laughter.
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Private companies have a lot of capital. They can run things efficiently and get projects built.
Steve Martin
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... you're nuts but you're welcome here.
Steve Martin
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I ignored my stand-up career for twenty-five years, but now, having finished this memoir, I view this time with surprising warmth. One can have, it turns out, an affection for the war years.
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I understood that as much as I had resisted the outside, as much as I had constricted my life, as much as I had closed and narrowed the channels into me, there were still many takers for the quiet heart.
Steve Martin
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Only then does he realize what he has done to Mirabelle, how wanting a square inch of her and not all of her has damaged them both, and how he cannot justify his actions except that, well, it was life.
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I'm for the Wall Street Occupiers. But will they accept me when they find out I sell packaged mortgage default instruments to children?
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When I die, now don't think that I'm a nut, don't want no fancy funeral, just one like old King Tut.
Steve Martin
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First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.
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The Apple Pie Hubbub was a significant novel for me, because that's when I first started using verbs.
Steve Martin