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A key and a strangler - this is all a simple tale requires.

Steve Aylett

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Steve Aylett
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: January 1
Author
Novelist
Satirist
Science Fiction Writer
Bromley
Keys
Simple
Tale
Tales
Requires

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He has been positively growing tusks trying to create a breed of human insect which will continue to live on this accursed planet. Everyone needs a goal.
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In books there's nothing of the fish covered in the coldness of the sea, or the feeling of a star touching space. Bad for business.
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How many times does a man have to shave before his chin gets the message?
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Stab me if you can enjoy it - but not if it feels like a duty. Stab me vertically if I'm lying down and horizontally if I'm running
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From space this Earth is incandescent with abominations - the gods write their signature in our entrails
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Originality irritates so obscurely that people may have to evolve to scratch it.
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A hundred percent of marriages end in divorce, disappearance or death.
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One golfer a year is hit by lightning. This may be the only evidence we have of God's existence.
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The best way of getting into something is to think of it as mischief.
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Hang up the phone on a vampire, the definition of carefree.
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In America, fundamentalist Christians believe the world was created 6,000 years ago - in England people drink in bars that are older than that.
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Most books are so well written they barely have any effect on the reader's senses
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Honesty is the voice that is acceptable in every matter.
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An office is a machine for dying.
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The great thing about being ignored is that you can speak the truth with impunity.
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One thing you’ll say for skeletons, they’ll always give you a smile.
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The most amusing thing about a pantomime horse is the necessity of having to shoot it twice.
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Since childhood I’d been suspected of imagination
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Ideas are self-replenishing, like snot
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Biting enemies seems to be acceptable in a surprisingly narrow range of circumstances, or so a ninja shouted at me once
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