Quote

Newspapermen learn to call a murderer an alleged murderer and the King of England the alleged King of England in order to avoid libel suits.

Stephen Leacock

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Stephen Leacock
Age: 74 †
Born: 1869
Born: December 30
Died: 1944
Died: March 28
Economist
Humorist
Political Scientist
Writer
Hants
Stephen Butler Leacock
England
Newspapermen
Call
Alleged
Learn
Libel
Order
Murderer
Suits
Avoid
King
Kings

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Anybody who has listened to certain kinds of music, or read certain kinds of poetry, or heard certain kinds of performances on the concertina, will admit that even suicide has its brighter aspects.
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You frequently ask, where are the friends of your childhood, and urge that they shall be brought back to you. As far as I am able to learn, those of your friends who are not in jail are still right there in your native village. You point out that they were wont to share your gambols, If so, you are certainly entitled to have theirs now.
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The landlady of a boarding-house is a parallelogram - that is, an oblong angular figure, which cannot be described, but which is equal to anything
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You can never have international peace as long as you have national poverty.
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Chess is one long regret.
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Being a specialist is one thing, getting a job is another.
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Humour is essentially a comforter, reconciling us to things as they are in contrast to things as they might be.
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Men are able to trust one another, knowing the exact degree of dishonesty they are entitled to expect.
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I admit that when the facts are not good enough, I always exaggerate them.
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With the Great Detective, to think was to act, and to act was to think. Frequently he could do both together.
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The sorrows and disasters of Europe always brought fortune to America.
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Charles Dickens' creation of Mr. Pickwick did more for the elevation of the human race - I say it in all seriousness - than Cardinal Newman's Lead Kindly Light Amid the Encircling Gloom. Newman only cried out for light in the gloom of a sad world. Dickens gave it.
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You cannot depict love inside a frame of fact. It needs a mist to dissolve in.
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There is no doubt that many things in life come to us...at backrounds so to speak. Happiness is one of them.
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The minute a man is convinced he is interesting, he isn't.
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Writing is no trouble: you just jot down ideas as they occur to you. The jotting is simplicity itself - it is the occurring which is difficult.
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The classical scholars have kept alive the tradition of the superiority of the ancient languages -- a kaleidoscopic mass of suffixes and prefixes, supposed to represent an infinite shading of meaning. It is a character they share with the Ojibway and the Zulu.
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In ancient times they had no statistics so they had to fall back on lies.
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It takes a good deal of physical courage to ride a horse. This, however, I have. I get it at about forty cents a flask, and take it as required.
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The Victorians needed parody. Without it their literature would have been a rank and weedy growth, over-watered with tears.
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