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The landlady of a boarding-house is a parallelogram - that is, an oblong angular figure, which cannot be described, but which is equal to anything

Stephen Leacock

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Stephen Leacock
Age: 74 †
Born: 1869
Born: December 30
Died: 1944
Died: March 28
Economist
Humorist
Political Scientist
Writer
Hants
Stephen Butler Leacock
Economy
Angular
Science
Swag
House
Boarding
Cannot
Swagger
Anything
Described
Figure
Oblong
Figures
Landlady
Equal
Parallelogram

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Anybody who has listened to certain kinds of music, or read certain kinds of poetry, or heard certain kinds of performances on the concertina, will admit that even suicide has its brighter aspects.
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You frequently ask, where are the friends of your childhood, and urge that they shall be brought back to you. As far as I am able to learn, those of your friends who are not in jail are still right there in your native village. You point out that they were wont to share your gambols, If so, you are certainly entitled to have theirs now.
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The road comes to an end just when it ought to be getting somewhere. The passengers alight, shaken and weary, to begin, all over again, something else.
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Humour is essentially a comforter, reconciling us to things as they are in contrast to things as they might be.
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I am what is called a professor emeritus—from the Latin e, 'out,' and meritus, 'so he ought to be.
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Too much has been said of the heroes of history-the strong men, the troublesome men too little of the amiable, the kindly, the tolerant.
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Golf may be played on Sunday, not being a game within the view of the law, but being a form of moral effort.
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Men are able to trust one another, knowing the exact degree of dishonesty they are entitled to expect.
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In ancient times they had no statistics so they had to fall back on lies.
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Life, we learn too late, is in the living, the tissue of every day and hour.
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If every day in the life of a school could be the last day but one, there would be little fault to find with it.
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Being a specialist is one thing, getting a job is another.
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About the only good thing you can say about old age is, it's better than being dead!
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The great man... walks across his century and leaves the marks of his feet all over it, ripping out the dates on his goloshes as he passes.
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I've seen lifelong friends drift apart over golf just because one could play better, but the other counted better.
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My parents migrated to Canada in 1876, and I decided to go with them.
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