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It takes a good deal of physical courage to ride a horse. This, however, I have. I get it at about forty cents a flask, and take it as required.

Stephen Leacock

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Stephen Leacock
Age: 74 †
Born: 1869
Born: December 30
Died: 1944
Died: March 28
Economist
Humorist
Political Scientist
Writer
Hants
Stephen Butler Leacock
Take
Horse
Good
Physical
However
Flask
Courage
Flasks
Deal
Cents
Deals
Required
Takes
Ride
Economy
Forty

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In ancient times they had no statistics so they had to fall back on lies.
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I admit that when the facts are not good enough, I always exaggerate them.
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All Dickens's humour couldn't save Dickens, save him from his overcrowded life, its sordid and neurotic central tragedy and its premature collapse. But Dickens's humour, and all such humour, has saved or at least greatly served the world.
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I am what is called a professor emeritus—from the Latin e, 'out,' and meritus, 'so he ought to be.
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Personally, I would sooner have written Alice in Wonderland than the whole Encyclopedia Britannica.
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The sorrows and disasters of Europe always brought fortune to America.
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Chess is one long regret.
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Humour is essentially a comforter, reconciling us to things as they are in contrast to things as they might be.
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Being a specialist is one thing, getting a job is another.
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Anybody who has listened to certain kinds of music, or read certain kinds of poetry, or heard certain kinds of performances on the concertina, will admit that even suicide has its brighter aspects.
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If every day in the life of a school could be the last day but one, there would be little fault to find with it.
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Life, we learn too late, is in the living, the tissue of every day and hour.
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There is an old motto that runs, If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. This is nonsense. It ought to read, If at first you don't succeed, quit, quit at once.
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American politicians do anything for money... English politicians take the money and won't do anything.
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A lone maple leaf resting on sand Have you ever been out for a late autumn walk in the closing part of the afternoon, and suddenly looked up to realize that the leaves have practically all gone? And the sun has set and the day gone before you knew it, and with that a cold wind blows across the landscape? That's retirement.
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Most people tire of a lecture in ten minutes clever people can do it in five. Sensible people never go to lectures at all. But the people who do go to a lecture and who get tired of it, presently hold it as a sort of grudge against the lecturer personally. In reality his sufferings are worse than theirs.
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About the only good thing you can say about old age is, it's better than being dead!
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With the Great Detective, to think was to act, and to act was to think. Frequently he could do both together.
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