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What I rediscovered was the therapeutic nature of singing lessons. They're like doing yoga but for [the] inside of your body. You open up and use muscles that you don't think of as malleable.
Stephen Colbert
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Stephen Colbert
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 13
Actor
Comedian
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Washington
District of Columbia
Stephen Tyrone Colbert
Like
Singing
Inside
Open
Rediscovered
Use
Malleable
Nature
Therapeutic
Body
Muscles
Think
Yoga
Thinking
Lessons
More quotes by Stephen Colbert
There must be a God, because I don't know how things work.
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When the president decides something on Monday, he still believes it on Wednesday - no matter what happened Tuesday.
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I've always been a big fan of beauty. Sure, you can't judge a book by its cover but who wants to have sex with a book?
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(Rush are) like the JD Salinger of Canadian Prog Rock
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Folks, I don't trust children. They're here to replace us.
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Don't be bitter. Everybody suffers. If you can accept your suffering then you will understand other people better. Be grateful for pain. Love life.
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I imagined myself living in New York in some sort of open, large but sparse studio apartment with a lot of blond wood and a futon on the floor and a bubbling samovar of tea in the background and a big beard - living alone but with my beard - and doing theater. That's what I thought my life would be.
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Foreign newspapers: if they've got nothing to hide, how come they don't print them in English?
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Can you really put a price on annoying two religions at once?
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If you're injecting fear into other people, then you're trying to kill their minds. You're trying to get them to stop thinking.
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Join me in standing up against any actual knowledge about guns. Let the CDC know they can take away our ignorance when the pry it from our cold dead minds.
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Liberals want to burn the flag, but progressives just want to microwave it?
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You should spend more time with your families write that novel you've always wanted to write. You know, the one about the fearless reporter who stands up to the administration. You know - fiction.
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Sorry, but retirement offends me. You don’t just stop fighting in the middle of a war because your legs hurt. So why do you get to stop working in the middle of your life just because your prostate hurts? That’s desertion.
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Scientists have invented a new strain of cannabis without the high. They celebrated with non-alcoholic beer and furious dry-humping.
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I don't accept the status quo. I do accept Visa, MasterCard, or American Express.
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It's like boxing a glacier. Enjoy that metaphor, by the way, because your grandchildren will have no idea what a glacier is.
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So if animals aren't our friends, then what are they? The answer can be summed up between two buns.
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In America, we know to ignore artists if they're serious in any way.
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As we all know, reality has a liberal bias.
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