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If Corporations are people, I guarantee you that a government of those people, by those people, and for those people will continue to exist.

Stephen Colbert

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Stephen Colbert
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 13
Actor
Comedian
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Washington
District of Columbia
Stephen Tyrone Colbert
Government
People
Guarantee
Guarantees
Corporations
Continue
Exist

More quotes by Stephen Colbert

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Yes, Dr. King is pro-gun just as surely as Jesus would be pro-nails.
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Give a man a suicide bomb, he blows up once. Teach a man to suicide bomb, he also blows up once.
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In order to be a top-tier candidate, I need 7.5 million dollars, and I currently have 0.0 million dollars.
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Can't wait for tomorrow when I get to exercise my patriotic duty as an American: Complaining about how long it's taking to VOTE.
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People would say, Oh, you say you just do jokes. I don't just do jokes. I do jokes. Jokes are important. They saved my life when I was younger. Hopefully we're making things nicer at the end of the day for people. That's the entire goal, and that's the touchstone and the North Star for the tone.
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I know that the pope's infallible, but that doesn't mean he can't make mistakes.
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When the president decides something on Monday, he still believes it on Wednesday - no matter what happened Tuesday.
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I love the Internet, and the Internet loves me back. Why else would it offer me so much sex?
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The greatest threat facing American today - next to voter fraud, the Western Pinebark beetle, and the memory foam mattress - is the national news media.
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Forgot to live-tweet the election last night, so I'm post-tweeting today. I'll start as soon as my fingers unclench from their rage fists.
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Life is an improvisation. You have no idea what's going to happen next and you are mostly just making things up as you go along.
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Donald Trump is a strong president. We got to stand behind this guy is what I think.
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No matter how you were born, no matter how you identify, I want to be clear that I would be proud to grind you up and eat you.
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Like O'Rielly, we'll grab the most important word of each sentence... 'The' for example. Also, I'll say, 'I'm angry,' and the graphic will read, 'Colbert angry.
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If the eyes are the window to the soul, then why does it hurt when I spray them with Windex?
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Cain understands domestic issues because he had experience selling pizza and he understands international issues because pizza is Italian.
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I actually do not think that's how what's happening to our government is going to be stopped. I think people who are willing to be civically engaged and believe in the promises and the progress of the last fifty years that will save this country.
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There must be a God, because I don't know how things work.
Stephen Colbert
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You said in your book that at the end of the day, every politician is human. What about during the day?
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There's a wonderfully cooperative relationship between management and labor right now. Much like the historic partnership between oranges and a juicer.
Stephen Colbert