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Sure, integrating schools may sound benign. But whats the use of living in a gated community if my kids go to school and get poor all over them?

Stephen Colbert

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Stephen Colbert
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 13
Actor
Comedian
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Washington
District of Columbia
Stephen Tyrone Colbert
May
Sure
Community
Poor
Sound
Gated
Living
Whats
Use
Integrating
Kids
Benign
School
Schools

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You CAN make an omelette without breaking eggs. It's just a really bad omelette.
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Everybody loves dogs. They're the pizza of the animal kingdom.
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If Obama can force you to get health insurance just by calling it a tax, than there is nothing to stop him from making you gay marry an illegal immigrant wearing a condom on a hydroponic pot farm powered by solar energy.
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There must be a God, because I don't know how things work.
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Marijuana is a gateway drug that can lead to awful things, like Phish getting back together.
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For me, improvisation is about working with a partner. That is much easier to do in the interview, because you have a sounding board.
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The liberal Gluten-free agenda is turning our dogs lesbian.
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I believe that the government that governs best is a government that governs least, and by these standards we have set up a fabulous government in Iraq.
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I actually do not think that's how what's happening to our government is going to be stopped. I think people who are willing to be civically engaged and believe in the promises and the progress of the last fifty years that will save this country.
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I'm a huge news junkie. I love what the news does.
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It warps the minds of our children and weakens the resolve of our allies.
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Of the over 100,000 wildfires that happen in the U.S. each year, not a single one would get started without the fire triangle: Oxygen, heat and fuel. Fire needs all three to exist. It's like the three branches of our government: Legislative, judicial and executive. The fewer there are, the safer we are.
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As Shakespeare said, there's nothin' cooler than droppin' the 'g's off of gerunds!
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And of course I don't go anywhere without my pet goldfish, Anthrax. I always tell security I'm carrying Anthrax. Yeah, sure I get a lot of guff about it, but it's a family name I'm not changing it.
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Obamacare needs the premiums of healthier people to cover the costs of sicker people. It's a devious con that can only be described as insurance.
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Senator Kerry does not support our troops. If he had won the election, there wouldn't be any troops left in Iraq. President Bush, on the other hand, has given our troops an opportunity to fight without end. That's creating jobs. In fact, the president's policies helped create 104 more job openings last month. Now who's stupid, Senator?
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My mom kind of led me toward acting. She wanted to be an actress when she was younger. That made me interested in it when I was a kid, because she and I are very close.
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What I rediscovered was the therapeutic nature of singing lessons. They're like doing yoga but for [the] inside of your body. You open up and use muscles that you don't think of as malleable.
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Corporations have free speech, but they can't speak like you and me. They don't have mouths or hands.
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News for the godless: religion is inescapable. there has never been a human society without some form of worship. And don't point to communist societies like the Soviet Union - they worshipped blue jeans.
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