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If you like Battlestar Galactica...you're probably a huge nerd.

Stephen Colbert

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Stephen Colbert
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 13
Actor
Comedian
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Washington
District of Columbia
Stephen Tyrone Colbert
Nerd
Huge
Probably
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More quotes by Stephen Colbert

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I hope people'll find out pretty quickly that the guy they saw for 10 years was my sense of humor the whole time.
Stephen Colbert
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Thinking that other people might be better than you is what makes you Canadian, not American.
Stephen Colbert
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If Germans are happy it means everyone else is miserable.
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Football is American why are the Romans numering our bowls?!
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I'm a huge news junkie. I love what the news does.
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If you think you can lead your flock of sheeple and peeps to some glorified noodle fest on the mall, you got another thing coming, mister.
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Marijuana is a gateway drug that can lead to awful things, like Phish getting back together.
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In God's eyes all children are beautiful but here on earth we have higher standards.
Stephen Colbert
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If women are breadwinners and men bring home the bacon, why do people complain about having no dough? I'm confused. Also hungry.
Stephen Colbert
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Never throw caution to the wind. It could whip back into your eyes and blind you.
Stephen Colbert
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If you use big words, no one will know you aren't doing jack squat.
Stephen Colbert
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Liberals want to burn the flag, but progressives just want to microwave it?
Stephen Colbert
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Senator Kerry does not support our troops. If he had won the election, there wouldn't be any troops left in Iraq. President Bush, on the other hand, has given our troops an opportunity to fight without end. That's creating jobs. In fact, the president's policies helped create 104 more job openings last month. Now who's stupid, Senator?
Stephen Colbert
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Of course! Jeb Bush! America is hungry for another leader from that talented family!
Stephen Colbert
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Not living in fear is a great gift, because certainly these days we do it so much. And do you know what I like about comedy? You can't laugh and be afraid at the same time - of anything. If you're laughing, I defy you to be afraid.
Stephen Colbert
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Can you really put a price on annoying two religions at once?
Stephen Colbert
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My brother Billy was the joke teller. My brother Jim had a really sharp, cutting wit. And the teller of long stories, that was my brother Ed. As a child, I just absorbed everything they said, and I was always in competition for the laughs.
Stephen Colbert
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The pen is mightier than the sword, if you shoot that pen out of a gun
Stephen Colbert
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It's no surprise I am addicted to all the Republican presidential candidates. They are like crack -- in that they will devastate black communities.
Stephen Colbert
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I can really find something interesting about almost anyone I talk to.
Stephen Colbert