Quote

Texas governor Rick Perry has been in the race only three days, and he's already blowing away the competition like it is a trespassing coyote.

Stephen Colbert

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Stephen Colbert
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 13
Actor
Comedian
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Washington
District of Columbia
Stephen Tyrone Colbert
Already
Coyotes
Days
Perry
Race
Rick
Away
Blowing
Three
Governor
Like
Governors
Texas
Coyote
Competition
Trespassing

More quotes by Stephen Colbert

Image
A new study shows that having a severe phobia can hasten aging. But what if my greatest fear IS aging?!?
Stephen Colbert
Image
Thinking that other people might be better than you is what makes you Canadian, not American.
Stephen Colbert
Image
People would say, Oh, you say you just do jokes. I don't just do jokes. I do jokes. Jokes are important. They saved my life when I was younger. Hopefully we're making things nicer at the end of the day for people. That's the entire goal, and that's the touchstone and the North Star for the tone.
Stephen Colbert
Image
Keep your facts, I'm going with the truth.
Stephen Colbert
Image
The liberal Gluten-free agenda is turning our dogs lesbian.
Stephen Colbert
Image
My grandfather did not travel across 4,000 miles of the Atlantic Ocean to see this country overrun by immigrants. He did it because he killed a man back in Ireland.
Stephen Colbert
Image
Take the platypus - that is not a finished product. It is clearly still in beta.
Stephen Colbert
Image
I teach Sunday school, motherf*****.
Stephen Colbert
Image
You CAN make an omelette without breaking eggs. It's just a really bad omelette.
Stephen Colbert
Image
Never throw caution to the wind. It could whip back into your eyes and blind you.
Stephen Colbert
Image
The skinnification of America's jeanscape has gone too far.
Stephen Colbert
Image
I love being onstage, I love the relationship with the audience.
Stephen Colbert
Image
Remember, Jesus would rather constantly shame gays than let orphans have a family.
Stephen Colbert
Image
No one has any idea what's going to happen. Not even Elon Musk. That's why he's building those rockets. He wants a 'Plan B' on another world.
Stephen Colbert
Image
What does Karl Marx put on his pasta? Communist Manipesto!
Stephen Colbert
Image
It's like boxing a glacier. Enjoy that metaphor, by the way, because your grandchildren will have no idea what a glacier is.
Stephen Colbert
Image
Now, for my younger viewers out there, a book is something we used to have before the internet. It’s sort of a blog for people with attention spans.
Stephen Colbert
Image
Ignorance is bliss. Oedipus ruined a great sex life by asking too many questions.
Stephen Colbert
Image
If I had one wish, it would be for self-drying pants. Wait -- no! Unlimited wishes! How do I return these stupid pants?!
Stephen Colbert
Image
If I'm doing a talk show or an interview, or pretty much anything where I can't control the context, I'm loath to do the character.
Stephen Colbert